I want to stabbinate everyone today.

And you're not even quitting smoking like Aimee is. Maybe you should take up smoking.

I also am "B.A. flea" today (like B.A. Baracas). Eating lots of peppermint patties to get through the day (I am calling them my mother's little helpers).

I don't know that the actual smoking helps, but going outside for 5 minutes definitely can...

Let's go back to thinking about how tiny babies grow up into amazing kids.

Love this

I want to stabbinate my sinuses today. Will that help relieve the pressure?

Seriously, I couldn't fall asleep last night and woke up a ton including for an hour at 4. Bleh! Fortunately I can work at home but am feeling VERY whiny and ick. I already worked at home one day last week due to this thing. I'm lucky that I really rarely get sick because I am a big cranky baby when I am.

Love this

Very much so!

Let's go back to thinking about how tiny babies grow up into amazing kids.

Yes, yes! Thinking lots of good thoughts for baby Reece.

Jess, both of your kids have the most AMAZING eyes. They're just gorgeous.

Gah, I am a moron who cannot communicate at all and I still want to stab EVERYONE. IN THE FACE.

I had that yesterday. Do you think it passes through the cable?

I am SUCH a bad interviewer. I think I need to write myself a script and stick to it, but every time I am interviewing I am desperately busy.

What is weird is that I am a good interviewee. When I was younger and looking for jobs, I had a hard time getting an interview, but I almost always got the jobs I interviewed for.

I had that yesterday. Do you think it passes through the cable?

It must, although I seem to have a chronic strain.

I'm increasingly aware that I don't process spoken language like most people do, and I try to not misunderstand things. Or, rather, if someone says something that seems "off," I try to figure out if there's a different reading of what they just said; 9.5 times out of 10, there is, and I just understood what they said differently.

But sometimes a statement's meaning seems obvious to me based on context. For instance, knowing what I know about a given situation, "You are on fire!" probably doesn't mean I am literally engulfed in flames -- unless I'm standing too close to a bonfire.

So this morning, I had one of those situation where I was sure I understood what chatty!co-worker said, due to context, but of course I misunderstood.

He told the 3 of us in my area "If [so-and-so] doesn't e-mail us, we are off work on MLK Day." I assumed the "if" was conditional -- meaning, if she does NOT e-mail us, we are off work, but if she DOES e-mail us, we have to work Monday. It makes grammatical sense, and, frankly, it's the way my office works. No clear holiday schedule -- just try to guess if we're off.

So my reaction was "I thought she already told us [in person] that we're closed Monday -- why would she change her mind?!?" And, of course, she didn't change her mind. That wasn't Chatty's point at all. What he meant was "[So-and-so] told some of us *in person* that we are closed on MLK Day, but she hasn't sent an e-mail yet. If she never gets around to e-mailing, those of you who weren't told in person might not know that we are closed on MLK Day. So, to be clear, we are closed Monday."

I will never, ever get it right.