More performers I hate:

James Durbin. Oh, great. More hating. I just do not get this kid at all. He’s not even a poor man’s Glambert. He’s just a poor man’s poor man. I suppose he’s singing whatever scream-y song he’s singing well. I didn’t hear any egregiously bad notes. Steven Tyler may not want to say it, but this kid needs to get more control. And is the blinky thing the Tourette’s? (BTW, one of his “fans” was in the audience with a Tourette’s Rocks poster already. Already! I refuse, yall!) I am a terrible person so I’m just gonna come out and say that the blinky thing is already old and I don’t enjoy. And this fool is just ugh . . . “Here with the best audience in the world” frikkin’ schmoozing personality and it just rubs me the wrong way and just no. This fool is going to hang around forever and be my worst nightmare. A sickening combo of white Stevie Wonder No Pity pandering, David Cook true artist bullshit that’s just gonna mean he sings covers of songs not normally done on this show (whether or not that’s done well) and Gokey 2.0 back story pimping now that Medina’s gone. He’s going to the finale, isn’t he? Sigh.

Robbie Rosen. The big muppet head and the nose. Oh, god. I’m tired. This is only half? I’m so tired. How can I be this tired already? Sarah McLaughlin? The weirdest arrangement of this song I’ve heard in a while. This is a strange, strange song choice. And putting all these weird runs in is ruining it. The beauty of this song lays in it’s purity. That melody is gorgeous. Just shut up and sing it straight. Sigh. Young kids. Just because you can do all those runs doesn’t mean that you should. He sang it OK (although there were some missed notes) and still I hated it. No, JLo. All the notes really do need to be perfectly perfect despite the fact that your entire career may say otherwise. How is it that I’m agreeing with the Dawg tonight? How is that happening? Something is wrong with the universe. Very, very wrong. Dammit, do not make me agree with Randy. See this? This is why I'm so tired.

And now performers I like:

Scotty McCreary – You are a grown ass man. Stop letting people call you Scotty. He can be a huge, huge country star. Trust and believe. He can’t win this show, but it kind of doesn’t even matter. The Pickle, Josh Gracin, Bucky Covington. Shoot, lots of country singers from this show didn’t win and have still gone on to have solid country careers and he could do the same. And I love this song, Letter from Home. Great, great song choice. He sung it really well. And Steven Tyler is right. He just couldn’t have picked a better song. And JLo is right, too. This kid was born to sing country music. And the Dawg is right, too. He’s a throwback country kid, not a country pop crossover kid like La Underwood. Which makes me even more mystified why they put him on this show where there will be only one country theme night. This kid on R&B night? Disco night? Songs Gwen Stefani likes or whatever lame ass themes they pull out of their asses? Oh, it’s not going to be pretty.

Stefano Langone – Is a cutie patootie. I wanna just eat him up. Too bad his voice is just not really up to snuff. Again, props for picking an of the minute song. Amazing by B.o.B. Sadly for him, the Glee kids did it better and when Finn can outsing you? You got troubles. His performance was not on point, even though he’s really really trying to sell it. The judges may try to soft pedal the pitch problems and I agree that he makes you want to like him, but that’s not enough to win this show. I think he’s doing enough to get through to the top 10, and he definitely got better as the song went on, but he’s not special enough. He’s a total redshirt. He even dressed the part.

And now for performers I like but then dislike:

Paul McDonald – Singing Maggie May again. I liked the snippet of it that I saw during the audition rounds and I like it here, too. He has such an interesting voice. It could be annoying, but miraculously, it’s not. I really, really enjoy this fool. I enjoy the herky-jerky dancing. I like the skinny, man in black look. I love the smile and he’s totally engaging and seems authentic up there. And most importantly, he sang so, so pretty. I’m flabbergasted. Flabbergasted at how well he’s done. He made me believe that he might actually be able to do something in this competition. Huh. He needs to lay off the self tanner, though. Like the judges, I, too, am a fan. Damn, he’s as red-orange as Ryan. Seriously, lay off the self tanner.

Jacob Lusk – Is too much and not enough all at the same time. How did I know he’d sing Luther? And he is so far off the melody on the very first notes of A House Is not a Home. And I do not like this song all tenor fabulous. It just doesn’t sit well in this range. He is playing with the melody in ways I don’t like. His church home would give him a sniff and polite applause after that one. They might stand up, but behind their fans they’d be talking about how off he was and oh, wasn’t it so sad and usually that baby has a voice touched by god and maybe he’s sick, you know I heard he had AIDS, what?, girl yes, no, yes, ummm, what a shame, well he has sounded better, sister. That’s what would happen. He needs to go back and listen to Jimmy IV again and remember what he said about simplicity and . . . I don’t know, try again. Judges are on that monkey crack with this one.

Final performer I liked and then summary judgement!

Casey Abrams – I Put a Spell on You. Wow. I kind of love this kid in every way that one can love. He just makes me smile. This is not his best vocal ever, but I just don’t care. Who would pick this song? This kid, that's who. I am in love with this nerdy white kid doing this funky voodoo soul classic. And the “You’re mine” at the end? Stop it. Just stop it. He had pitch problems all up, down, over and around that song. Vocally, it wasn’t all that good. But man, was it entertaining. Good use of the pimp slot. I would vote for this kids if I voted.

Loved:

Paul – Best of the night, both vocally and performance wise

Casey – Great performance, only so-so vocal

Liked:

Brett – Clean vocal, really uncomfortable performance

Scotty – Great vocal, good performance, too one dimensional to win this show

Meh:

Junbug – Went first, vocal was only so-so, kind of bland peformance. All over forgettable

Tim – Absolutely dreadful song choice and bad vocal but he’s likeable so I think he’ll make it through

Stefano – Decent but not great vocal (which is kind of his thing) but again he’s likeable and cute as a button which at this stage should be enough

Hated:

Jovany – Boring, (not even all that) pretty boy who can’t sing well

Jordan – Terrible song choice, terrible vocal, laughably bad performance and the dancing. Also, he’s come off as a bitch this whole time, so yeah. He’s toast.

James - Vocally, he was good but I just straight up hate him

Robbie – Again, not the worst vocally. But far from the best. And I just straight up don’t like him

Jacob – So many missed notes, so much oversinging, so much ado about nothing

Going Home

Jordan will definitely go home. If god loved me, James would go home but ain’t no way he’s leaving this week. Could be Junbug for going first and being boring about it or Jovany for being boring and singing a tired ass song tiredly. Might be Tim in a shocker for singing the absolute worst song for him that he possibly could have and then being awkward throughout the entire performance and then trying to piss on America’s leg and tell us it’s raining. I would also take Jacob, but after the judge pimping, ain’t no way. They will get their contractually obligated Chikeze Eze Memorial Pumpkin Pimp slot (also known as the black man’s spot) filled.

ETA: So I totally was not knowing how this show worked this season. They're cutting down to top 10 this week? Woah, harsh. Well, in that case, I'll go with Paul, Casey, James (bleagh), Scotty and probably Brett. And the judges will put Jacob through due to the aforementioned Chikeze Eze Memorial Pumpkin Pimp clause.

Okay, while Paul McDonald can sing, and actually seems to be a musician, which is a huge advantage on this show, the whole mega-tooth-whitened hipster thing is annoying me. Also he sort of reminds me of Joe Cocker, and not in a good way.

Thank you! I think that was the thing that was bugging me. It wasn't that he was overtanned, it was the teeth. So white that they actually made his complexion look darker. Now I can't get that episode of Friends out of my mind where Ross over-whitens his teeth. "Demon! Demon!" Oh, man. That's funny.

I still like Paul McDonald quite a bit and think he was by far the best of the night.

I have had Top Chef dreams two nights in a row! Both featuring Carla! (And one in which Jimmy Carter was a guest contestant!)

So, the big deal chef from my town is gonna be on Top Chef Masters. [link] We happen to share a name, and his daughters go to school with my kids, so everyone from my state representative to the dry cleaner keeps asking me if I'm his wife. Great guy, great family, and he has a huge tattoo of a radish on his forearm. What's not to love?

BTW, Kat, I looked him up and Scotty McCreary is only 17. He may have a grown ass man voice, but he's still a baby!

Tonight I watched on Tivo delay. Singers I allowed to do the whole song: Karen, Pia, Haley (I feel like such a terrible snob for thinking she's so trashy, but she's so trashy, right?), Lauren Turner (she needs to learn to dress so she looks like she has a neck), Naima, Lauren Alaina (but just barely, and partly I let her sing because I was mystified at how a 16 year old girl can look so much like she's 35), Thia. Karen is adorable and is my pick to go far.

Lauren Alaina is 16?? I thought she was on the older end of the age range. That kinda makes the pink Toddlers and Tiaras dress she wore the other week a wee bit more understandable.

I had to miss it due to a last minute temp job assignment.

Well, that was an excellent TC - but I imagine we're going to have two eliminations prior to the actual final judging, aren't we.