So, the big deal chef from my town is gonna be on Top Chef Masters. [link] We happen to share a name, and his daughters go to school with my kids, so everyone from my state representative to the dry cleaner keeps asking me if I'm his wife. Great guy, great family, and he has a huge tattoo of a radish on his forearm. What's not to love?

BTW, Kat, I looked him up and Scotty McCreary is only 17. He may have a grown ass man voice, but he's still a baby!

Tonight I watched on Tivo delay. Singers I allowed to do the whole song: Karen, Pia, Haley (I feel like such a terrible snob for thinking she's so trashy, but she's so trashy, right?), Lauren Turner (she needs to learn to dress so she looks like she has a neck), Naima, Lauren Alaina (but just barely, and partly I let her sing because I was mystified at how a 16 year old girl can look so much like she's 35), Thia. Karen is adorable and is my pick to go far.

Lauren Alaina is 16?? I thought she was on the older end of the age range. That kinda makes the pink Toddlers and Tiaras dress she wore the other week a wee bit more understandable.

I had to miss it due to a last minute temp job assignment.

Well, that was an excellent TC - but I imagine we're going to have two eliminations prior to the actual final judging, aren't we.

Mike I. is still an asshole, but damn his dish did look awfully good.

I'll be real curious to read in the blogs about this one. I can't imagine that they were set for all 5 to go from the start. I wonder if there is a "perfect storm" option in the rules in case everyone knocks it out of the park.

I was terrified for Carla because Tom kept mentioning things about the vegetables lacking, despite way praising the broth.

I am watching Idol for the first time in YEARS...probably since the third season? Because my roommate is. I haven't watched before this week, but watched yesterday and today.

And seriously, the girls are kicking the boys' asses. Last night several times I was like "TAKE A DAMN BREATH, AND THEN SUPPORT YOUR NOTES!" Tonight, mostly just a couple girls who are pitchy. But seriously, to a couple of them, (a) You are no Kelly Clarkson and (b) You are SURE as hell no Reba. What crack are the judges smoking telling her she sounds good??!?!

flea, I know Scotty is 17 but I still maintain that 17 is too damn old to have people calling you Scotty unless you are in the engine room of the starship Enterprise and speaking with a heavy brogue. Just, no. Be Scott and be all about that.

So the girls put their feet in the boys booties tonight, right? And some of them downright surprised me in a good way.

Only a few girls totally screwed the pooch. They were:

Ta-Tynisa Wilson – Is going home tonight. Why are we even watching her? Only Girl? Rhi Rhi? And she sounds like shit. Like absolute shit. And the boobs are this close to a wardrobe malfunction. I just don’t even know what to do with that. Worse than Jordan’s OMG? I think maybe yes. Steven Tyler was just captivated by the boobs. And it was a little shaky in the beginning, JLo? Did she hit any note on the front end of this song? Any one? Why is JLo lying to this girl? That would only ever move the crowd to the exits.

Rachel Zevita – Singing Criminal. And I hate the arrangement. Wow, do I hate the arrangement. And she’s so busy trying to sell it and walking around like a maniac that the voice sounds like ass. Well, this is the best she’s ever looked. There’s that right? (Miss you, Paula!) But honestly, the look is about it. Because the whole thing was just a mistake. That was a bad, bad idea. Where was Jimmy IV? I don’t think he would’ve let it go down like that.

Ashthon Jones – What is she wearing? Jean bustier and black leggings with zippers on the thigh? Love All Over Me? Umm, this is not the Howard University Homecoming Talent Show. And it was so shouty and wannabe diva and wow. If it had been the Howard University Homecoming Talent Show, she would've gotten the hook. That was tremendously awful. Like epically awful. The judges just let her bluff her way through that performance because the vocal was not good. At all. She does, indeed, have the whatitisness. But that performance was ass.

Julie Zorilla – Is so, so pretty. Just really. She’s JLo pretty. Breakaway. Oh, no. You do not sing Kelly Clarkson on Idol. And you definitely don’t sing her badly. This song is eating her lunch, y’all. She is not a belter. Why? Why would she pick this song? What a horrible, horrible song choice. And she knows it, too. And the judges. Did you see Randy’s face? Ouch. And her face at the end of this song was the saddest thing ever. She knows she screwed the pooch. Well, she’s going home then. Sad.

These girls were a grab bag of meh (or else they were OK but I just don't happen to particularly care for them which is the same as meh):

Naima Adedapo – She’s going to sing Summertime? Oh, no. No, baby, no. ‘Tasia owns Summertime on the Idol stage. It might be home for you, but you’re not home. And the dress is insane. A gold doily wrapped in a table cloth wrapped in napkins. At least she’s doing a much jazzier version and cheesing the hell out of it. She sounds fine. Actually, she sounded better than fine. She sounded really, really good. I liked the arrangement and I could’ve enjoyed the song with my eyes closed. Sadly, as soon as I opened them she was there dressed like an insane person and being cheesy. Overall, though, I agreed with the Dawg that it really picked up speed as it went along. By the end, she found a nice groove. It was a cheese festival in the beginning, though.

Kendra Chantelle – I like this girl. She’s kinda trashy, but OK. Impossible. Oh, you want to take on Xtina? You better be prepared to throw down if you’re trying to take it there. The first part of the song? She was kind of doin’ it to it, OK? And oops, then in the middle on all the “It’s impossibles” she kind of just lost it entirely. I think she realized in that moment what she had taken on and what she was trying to do and then she lost her nerve. The last notes and runs were definitely not delivered with the same confidence and verve as the front end. Still and all, I don’t think we’ve seen a better attempt at Xtina ever on this show. She (continued...)

( continues...) came out of that mainly unscathed, so props for that because Ms. Aguilera is no joke.

Haley Reinhart – Also known as the note killer. And she’s singing Fallin’. Great. The granddaddy of the non-song song. And yet, she was doing her thing on this song. She sounded really, really good. Great tone to her voice and the pitch was right in the pocket. The runs were crystal clear. Lots of power, did interesting things with the melody. She oozed confidence up there. Wow. She was great on a crappy song. “If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.” Ha! Steven Tyler, I love you.

Thia Megia – I just don’t get this girl. She’s such a big ball of nothing. And is she singing that Irene Cara classic from Fame, Out Here on My Own? This is so school pagaent. Oh, this is tragic. What 15 year old even knows this song? I sang this song once during a summer camp concert at the Hollywood Boys and Girls Club, but I think this movie was out in the theaters at the time and I was like 12. I wouldn’t sing it if I were going on American Idol. It’s like watching someone’s granddaughter perform at the family restaurant. Is this star material? I don’t know. I don’t think so. What do they see in this girl? I just don’t see it. I don’t get it.

Pia Toscano – In the pimp slot? Huh. I’ll Stand by You. It’s pretty. Much less vibrato than I remember from earlier rounds and a much more pleasing tone. It’s . . . competent. But after some of the previous performances that were serious highlights, was this really pimp slot worthy? And the end was mighty shouty. Eh. It wasn’t a bad performance. But that’s no show closer, honey.

These ladies turned it all the way out:

Karen Rodriguez – Hero. I was so scared, I really thought this lady did not have the voice to take on Mariah. But you know what? She shocked the hell out of me. She kind of tore it up on this song. It wasn’t Mimi by any means, but that was a good thing. I liked the bilingual flava. She could work that latin pop thing. Half those girls can’t sing at all. Thalia? Paulina Rubio? Yeah, they don’t have a voice like this girl. I kind of was not knowing about this one. She blew it out of the water. Again, perhaps the best attempt at Mimi we’ve seen on this show.

Lauren Turner – I was hoping she would do well ‘cause I like her. And she still needs a make over real, real bad. But as far as the voice goes? She is so, so serious, y’all. I love this girls voice! 7 Day Fool? Oh, yeah. She can do that whole Adele/Duffy/Amy Winehouse thing. What a cool song choice. Oh and she just let loose on the last part of that song. What? She’s crazy good. It was a perfect full complete sentence. I will use that as a compliment tomorrow. I don’t know what JLo was talking about. I didn’t need any sauce on that plate. I thought she brought it just fine. And better than fine. Homegirl can just blow.

Lauren Alaina – This girl can just sing. And she’s fun. A little firecracker. I don’t know the song, but I want to own this version of hers right now. I would buy it on itunes. Today. I got my ninety nine cents ready. Strangé, lady. I love your 700 million year old ass. A natural. JLo has that right. This girl was born to do this.

I have no idea who'll make top 5. I'd take Karen and the Laurens A. and T. After that, it's a crap shoot. Haley sang really well tonight. I still think Naima is interesting and she didn't sing poorly tonight. I just had issues with the song choice. So I'd probably take those two. I think the judges will probably favor Thia, Pia and likely Kendra to either of those two, and probably to Lauren T. when you get right down to it. I really only think Julie, Rachel and Ta-Tynisa are completely out of the running.

Seriously? You liked Lauren A?? Huh. I thought she was awful! But then, I love the song (it's Reba)