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Frequently asked questions!
Phoenix edition
Warning: This FAQ may contain spoilers up to and including the full run of Buffy, Firefly the Series and Angel.
Mythology: Answers to frequently asked questions about the mythology of the shows are in our Mythology FAQ.
The Resurrection and the Life: Phoenix Board - Funding/Donations - Buffista Merchandise
General: Origins of the Buffistas - Syndication - Tapes/DVDs - Accents/Singing - Links - Recruitment
Customs and Ritual Practices: Registration - Taglines - Posting - StorTroopers - Font Stuff - QuickEdit - Quoting for reply - Blocking Users - Spoilers - Spoiler Font - Intra-board Links - Links Outside - Navigation - Natter - John H Natter Diet
Dialect: Initials - TT - WX - Buffistas - Retcon - Post Cereal - BuffyNAngle4Evah - OCM - CoW - KoB - General Forehead - CVR - DH/SO/GF/BF - Exclamation Points - Filk - FFANG - NAFDA - Foamy - NGA - HSQ - IIRC - NATLBSB - YMMV - YBMV - BRQG - Wrod - Timelies - Doblerize - M.E. - MoG - BBoC - Fuffy and Baith - GGG - Schmuck Bait - Shooting Scripts - Cousin Clingon - Slash - TCBITW - UST - Wildfeed - I'm [x]ing Right Now! - Porn - Apocolypti
History: Jossverse Backstory - History of the Buffy Threads on TT & WX - So Many Threads - Buffista Search Engine - Thread Archive - Filk Archive - TT Episode Discussions
Traditional Costumes: Leather Pants - Leather Pants Shoutout - Accessories - Not very naked Gunn
Famous Citizens: Tim - jengod - Nilly - Betsy - ita - Hellish - Shrift - Mejia - meara - Knut the Difficult & Manservant Hecubus
Character Worship & Other Religions: Willow Worship - Giles! - Spoiler Prayer - VCR Prayer - Cultishness - ObLightbulb - FAQ Additions
Last updated: 5.10.2008
Latest additions: By Jon B (still here): Ignoring the content and just making it look right with the new css layout. By Jon B (back and better than ever): Began the Fabulous FAQ Makeover (by tina f.). By Jon B (no comment): Added updated Spoiler policy (by Cindy). By Jon B (who else?): Split out the Mythology FAQ. By Jon B (chillin'): Added "Doblerize" (by Betsy HP). By Jon B (sans valentine): Updated spoiler policy (by candyb). By Jon B (yo!): Added to entry for NAFDA (by Katie M). By Jon B (oy!): Added entries for meara (by billytea) and John H Natter Diet (by Jesse). By Jon B (*sigh*): Updated when Angel airs and fixed Bureaucracy link at the bottom. By Jon B (feeling lonely here): Added entry for "I'm [x]ing Right Now". By Jon B (once more, with feeling): Added entries for Caroma's VCR Prayer, Wrod, NGA and ita (all written by jengod). By Jon B (again): Added entries for BRQG, Shrift, navigation, NAFDA, and line breaks in quickedit. By Jon B: Reformatted to match the look and feel of the rest of the Phoenix Board, added entry on actor's initials, fixed various typos and links, and general editing. By Dana: Rewrote portions to reflect the existence of the Phoenix board, and updated information about the FX syndication schedule. By jengod; added information about the Phoenix Board; added discussion start link for "Tabula Rasa" "Smashed" "Wrecked" "The Quickening" & "Lullaby"; also definitions of FFANG, OCM, post cereal, retcon, TT, WX; various tense changes and updated release dates; whither ASH/Giles and naked Gunn; massive update of past threads table and a link to DX's bee-yoo-tee-full Buffista Thread Archive of zipped threads and general minor rejiggering of the order of stuff so it's more rational-like.
Contributors: askye, Anya G., Betsy HP, billytea, Candy B., Caroma, Dana D., David J. Schwartz, David S., Elena B., Eli Harvey, Elisabeth O., Emily S., Gudanov, ita, James Callan, jengod, Jesse, John H, Jon B., Katie M., kirvin, Liese S., Melissa W., Nilly, Nutty Vee, DX Machina, Steph L., Connie Hirsch, Victor Infante

The Resurrection and the Life:
Q. What is the Phoenix board? And what's with the name?
A. After the evacuation of TT, we decided to create our own forums rather than relying on other organizations to sponsor discussion boards. We camped out at WX while the Phoenix board was developed by a truly extraordinary group of Buffistas. And the name? Suggested by another extraordinary Buffista (Betsy Hanes Perry). We're rising from the ashes and all. The Phoenix Board opened on September 17, 2002.

Q. Cool! How can I help support the Buffista Phoenix Board? Money, right?
A. We would love financial support for a webhost, etc. If you would like to contribute some of your hard-earned money to the Phoenix Board, Jesse and Sophia Brooks are heading up the fundraising effort. Any amount is appreciated, none too small, none too big. E-mail donations@buffistas.org with your name, username and email, and they will e-mail you back with instructions about where to send a check. If you prefer to donate by PayPal, you can direct your donation to donations@buffistas.org.

Q. What if I want a pair of Buffista boxer shorts? Or a bucket hat?
A. Boy, are you in luck. We have a CafePress store full of Buffista merchandise. All items have the Buffistas.org logo on them, and some have the slogan "Do not startle the Buffistas".

General:
Q. Where did it all begin?
A. In the beginning there was Salon Table Talk, and the Buffistas met one another on Salon Table Talk, and it was a free Web-posting board provided by online magazine Salon, and it was good. In August 2001 Table Talk moved from being free to being a for-pay service, which was not so good. And lo, the Buffistas were sent out into the desert, and came unto an oasis, and rested there, and it was called WorldCrossing, which had pictures, and it was good too. But finally the Buffistas caught sight of the promised land, and it was called The Phoenix Board. It was ad-free. It was Buffista-built. In short, it was perfect. So the weary Buffistas laid down their loads and decided they would wander no more.

Q. What's up with the American syndication schedule for Mutant Enemy shows these days?
A. Buffy the Vampire Slayer runs five days a week on the FX network and is in general syndication on the weekends on other channels. You can see what episodes are playing on FX and at what times here.

Angel runs five days a week on TNT and is in general syndication on the weekends on other channels. You can find out what the current episodes and airtimes are here.

For both Buffy and Angel, the weekend syndication runs at various times of the day, as determined by the individual television station.

Q. Where can I get Buffy, Angel and Firefly on DVD?
A. There are lots of ways, depending on your location and your scruples.

Americans and Canadians can purchase entire seasons of each show (well, not an entire season of Firefly...but we shouldn't get into that here...stupid network wouldn't know a decent show if it bit them on the...oh yeah! DVDs) at the links below::
PAL-format people, those in the UK, Australia and elsewhere, can buy pretty much everything on Amazon UK, Blackstar or Choices Direct.

There are other options, but they are both illegal and morally questionable. You can try to download episodes using one of the multitude of Internet file-sharing schemes or find someone on an auction site who will sell you a set. Buyer beware. Have fun.

Q. Why does it matter where I live? What is this PAL business? I just want the DVDs!
A. Every DVD player is given a code for the region in which it's sold. And every DVD is formatted for one of two mutually incompatible television systems: NTSC or PAL. The player will refuse to play discs that are not coded for its region. And DVDs won't work if they are the incorrect format for your TV. This means that a disc bought in one country may not play on a player bought in another country. Doesn't sound fair to us, either. You can find out all about it here.

Q. James Marsters isn't English?
A. Nope. He was born in Northern California.

Q. Alexis Denisof isn't English?
A: Nope, he's an American, originally from Maryland, but he trained at the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Arts and worked in England for many years. (He's one of the villains in the Sharpe TV movies.)

Q: Oh, no, what about Anthony Stewart Head?
A. He's English, all right. And, for that reason, was resident accent/slang coach on the Buffy set. Of course, that isn't his real accent, either.

Q. Is that at least really Giles singing?
A. Yes. Anthony Stewart Head can sing, although his air guitar skills are in doubt. In fact, he starred for years as Frank-n-Furter in the London stage production of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. There's even an online collection of songs ASH has sung through the years.

Q. I remember a few weeks ago somebody posted a link to a good fanfic. Do I have to swim upstream against thousands of posts to find the link again?
A. If the system is working properly, no. Hopefully someone will have posted the link at the Buffista Links Page page. This page also has links to the most frequently referenced Buffy sites online, some fan sites and all the core Buffista sites. If you're looking for fanfiction in general, you might want to visit Fanfiction.net or the Buffy Fiction Archive.

Q. Can I add my own links there?
A. Yes, please do, especially if you have a personal homepage or a personal fanfic collection.

Q. My SO/parents/roommates/cats won't watch Buffy. They sneer at me and my tacky taste. They've finally agreed to watch Just One Episode, in order to shut me up. Which episode do you recommend?
A. Some Buffistas recommend you start with the first season right away. This way you don't have to explain any of the backstory.

Others suggest something from one of the middle seasons. This way you aren't constantly saying, "Oh, that's Angel, but he later got his own show," or "Oh, Cordy and Xander aren't dating any more."

Many Buffistas have had good results with Season 4's "Hush" (almost no dialogue, funny mime scenes) and "Something Blue" (Buffy and Spike become betrothed; hilarity ensues). If you don't have DVDs from Season 4, try "Earshot", from Season 3. Season 6's musical episode "Once More with Feeling" will often work wonders on an unbeliever, err, new viewer.

If you're trying to convert through Spike-lust (or even spickle-oost), "Crush" from Season 5 works. Sure, what Spike does in the episode is pretty creepy, but there's the Tongue Thing going on. Gaaah... excuse us. "Intervention," also from S5, offers a nobler, gentler Spike, and the notorious Buffy-job.

If these suggestions don't help you, we recommend finding new parents/SO/roommates. (The cats can simply be locked in the bedroom for the duration.)

Customs and Ritual Practices:
Q. How do I register at this here Phoenix Board?
A. First, go to the registration page (duh!). Fill out the online form with your user name and a valid email address, and then click the "OK" Button. An email will be sent to you with confirmation of registration and instructions on how to activate your account.

Q. I want one of those tagline things. What do I do?
A. Well, first of all, you have to be registered and logged in. Then, see the link on the left-hand side of the screen that says Set Profile? Click it. The first field at the top allows you to enter your tagline. To preserve taglines as they are retired, you can build a personal tagline museum in the description field section. On the same page, you can also change your subscriptions, email address and password. Note: After you click the OK button at the bottom of the page, the system will update your profile and display the following message: " Your profile has been updated as shown below." You will not be returned to the page you were reading when you clicked on the Set Profile link; use the back button on your browser or the links on the Set Profile page to return to the main discussion area.

Q. How do I Post?
A. Only registered users can post at the Phoenix Board, so registration is the first step. When you reach the end of a thread a comment box will appear at the bottom of the page for you to post your message. Type what you have to say and click the "Post Message" button. You may edit your posts, or delete them at a later time if required.

Q. What's with all those cool cartoon versions of the cast?
A. Those are StorTroopers. You can build your own Stor at http://www.stor.co.uk/ . Several talented people played around with creating Stors to represent the cast, and before we knew it, we had a gallery.

Q. Can I use HTML to format my posts in nifty and interesting ways?
A. Sure. For example, you can change the font size and style:
<font size="+1">BIGGER TEXT</font> BIGGER TEXT
<font size="-1">smaller text</font> smaller text
<b>bold text</b> bold text
<i>italicized text</i> italicized text
<u>underlined text</u> underlined text
<strike>struckthrough text</strike> struckthrough text.
You can't go crazy, though. To preserve our sanity, and for inconspicious workplace surfing, the administrators of the board have disallowed the <img> tag. So don't bother trying to post any images, because we won't see them.

Q. That HTML stuff sure is fiddly. I wish there was an easier way.
Actually there is -- Quick-Edit. It uses magical incantations instead of HTML code. Not really. It looks for certain special letters at the start of lines. The smart thing about it is that the board completely ignores single line breaks. Try it -- if you post Spike is
really
foamy
it will all come out as one long line. but if you post Spike is
i really
foamy
it will also come out as one long line, but with the word "really" in italics. The text will stay in italics until you force a line-break in the text box by hitting the Enter key. It's kind of counter-intuitive, but quicker, as you only have to three keystrokes instead of seven. Some more QuickEdit characters are described below, or see our Board how-to page for a complete list.

Q. How do I quote something I want to reply to?
Either italicize it, or place a forward facing caret > in front of it. If you use the caret, the text will end up looking like this: Quoted text for reply. If you use a right-square-bracket, ] then the text will be indented but in the regular font: Quoted text for reply. Like italics above, the text will be indented until you force a line break in the text box by hitting the Enter key.

Q. How do I block the posts of another poster?
A. If for whatever reason--say your mom has found the buffistas and is telling everyone all the embarrassing stories about you that she can think of--you've had enough of reading a certain person's posts, and you'd like some peace, you can block their posts. Click on the "Block" link beside a person's username to hide the content of their posts from your weary eyes. You'll still see their name, but the post itself will be blinvisible.

If you get curious about what your mom is saying about you now, you can clink on a link in the post, and display the text from that post only, while keeping all her other posts blocked.

When you and your mom finally make peace and you decide to start reading her posts again, you can unblock the posts by either clicking the "Unblock" link next to the individual's username, or you can click on "Set Profile", scroll down to the list of "Filtered Users", and uncheck the box beside the name of the individual(s) you wish to unblock. Hit "Ok" to save your changes to your profile page and voila, she is unblocked.

Generally, to keep things polite and humming along, we like to say that "The first rule of blocking, is not to talk about blocking." Announcing you've filtered someone is considered extremely rude. Accusing people of blocking you is also uncool. Just remember that "the Buffistas are...[a] flame-free community."

Q. What do you guys consider a spoiler?
A. Anything that hasn't been broadcast. So anything from the show and the preview trailers is okay, anything from TV Guide or anywhere else is a spoiler, including casting news, episode titles and plot twists. No white fonting. Spoilers should only be posted in the spoiler thread.

Q. Are all casting news items considered spoilers?
A. Most. When in doubt, treat them as spoilers (see previous Q&A). Certain main cast information is allowed during the Northern Hemisphere's summer off-season, under our Summer Casting Rules.

Major casting changes, to the Main Cast Only, announced by the network or studio, may be discussed, within their respective show threads only (e.g. post Angel news in the Angel thread, not in Bitches, not the other NAFDA threads), 4 weeks after the announcements, or 4 weeks after the previous season finale, whichever comes later. This allows those posters who wish to remain free from all casting news, to safely use the show threads for post-season discussion.

This casting news definition includes cast additions or departures that occur over summer hiatus only (not midseason). Plot points related to the character's arrival or departure are to be treated as spoilers. The Main Cast are those characters appearing in the opening credits. Summertime discussion of news regarding recurring and guest roles is not allowed in the main show threads, and must be contained to a spoiler or spoilers-lite thread.

Q. What if I can't determine if news is allowable under Summer Casting Rules?
A. Don't post it. Ask in the applicable spoiler or spoilers-lite thread. One of our experienced Buffista Spoiler Companions will be glad to help you figure it out. Chances are, if it's legal information, one of them will have already posted it in the applicable show thread, anyhow.

Q. Do I have to use the white font for spoilers?
A. In the Spoilage Lite threads, yes. In the main hardcore spoiler thread, no, but it's good form if there is something really really shocking and impending. Like, for example, quotes from an early-bird review. Also, be aware that people using text-only browsers like Lynx don't get any juice out of the white font, so it's nice to give them a text-only warning that there are spoilers ahead.

Q. How do you do the white font to hide spoilers?
A. Back in the old days, we had to use HTML to produce white font. Now, here at the glorious Phoenix Board, we have a QuickEdit shortcut. At the beginning of the line you want to display in white font, type a lowercase "s". Then type a space, and type the spoiler information. Everything after the "s" will be white-fonted until you start a new paragraph.

If for some reason, you like doing it the hard way, it goes like this: <font color="white">SPOILER HERE</font> will come out like this: SPOILER HERE. (Select the blank section with your mouse to see it appear.) This makes the text white, so it blends into the background. People who want spoilage can highlight, those who don't aren't ruined.

Q. Cool. Can I post in other colors besides white?
A. Yes, as long as it's not a spoiler! You can use color names or hexidecimal codes.

Q. How do I link to another Phoenix Board post?
A. First, get the URL of the post. The simplest way to do this is as follows:
  1. Right-click on the underlined post number in the post header, and select "Copy Shortcut" or "Copy Link", depending on your browser.
  2. Paste the link into the posting window.
  3. Post your post. It will come out looking like John H "A little bit of Buffy in our lives: Natter # 5" Mar 28, 2002 7:17:50 am EST The Phoenix Board automatically creates a link to it with the name of the poster, the time and date!
Q. How do I link to something outside of the Phoenix Board?
A. Just use good old-fashioned HTML.
<a href="http://www.somewhere.com/">Name of the link goes here</a> = Name of the link goes here

Q. How do I navigate around and between the threads?
A.Within a thread you can use the "Last", "First", "Next", and "Previous" buttons to navigate through the posts. The "Recent" link takes you to the page of most recent posts in that thread.

To check subscriptions in all your threads, you can use the "Message Center" option to check for new messages in your subscribed threads, or you can use the "Read New" link to check for new posts in all your threads.

If you decide that you want to look at what someone posted several hundred posts back, but don't want to sit at your computer all night hitting the "Previous" button, there is an easier way. If you look at the long URL for each page of posts, the final number in that string refers to the number of the post you are currently viewing. If you want to return to post 312, simply replace that last number with 312 and hit enter. You will then be taken to the post you requested.

Q. Is it okay to go off-topic?
A. It better be, because we live for thread drift. In fact, we got so natter-y that BHP started the first Natter Thread. It's a place where Buffistas can chat on all and sundry without distracting from serious Angel lustage and Faith missage on the main threads.

Q. Y'all talk a lot! I love it, but I can't keep up! Should I quit my job?
A. We do not recommend quitting your job in order to catch up with the Buffistas, although we understand the impulse --- threads here move really fast, and after even one day away, you will be faced with hundreds of new messages. So, what can be done? Lots.

If you want to read the discussion of a current episode, but just don't have time to read every message that came before it, Nillytown has links to the beginning of each episode's discussion.

If you just can't keep up in Natter, may we recommend the John H Natter Diet? It entails reading (1) the Beep Me thread for big personal news, (2) the Sunnydale Press thread for big community news, (3) Coffee on My Monitor for conversation highlights, and (4) the last 50 posts in Natter.

Once you have completed this diet, you may want to do a meara.

Dialect:
Q. What's with all the initials?
A. We're lazy, so we abbrieviate a lot. Perhaps our most common use of initials is when we abbieviate the actors' names. Here's a list of the most common ones. Other initials are explained in subsequent answers.
AA: Amy Acker
AB: Amber Benson
AD: Alexis Denisof
AH: Alyson Hannigan
ASH: Anthony Stewart Head
CC: Charisma Carpenter
DB: David Boreanez
EC: Emma Caulfield
JAR: J. August Richards
JM: James Marsters
MT: Michelle Trachtenberg
NB: Nicholas Brendon
SMG: Sarah Michelle Gellar

Q. TT?
A. Table Talk. The discussion forum at Salon.com.

Q. WX?
A. World Crossing. (X = Cross. Geddit?)

Q. Why do you call yourselves the Buffistas?
A. It comes from a tagline "'Do not startle the Buffistas.' --J H-M" belonging to Stephanie A. Johnson. She explained in B.3.6452: "Cross thread. Someone on one of my other threads (Grown Up Tantrums) mentioned DB, and Dana and I were joking about it. One of the uninitiated inquired as to who DB was, and J H-M said that 'it's a Buffy thing,' and then she posted the tagline." For the record, J H-M's full post was:

It's a Buffy thing. Just keep talking in a soothing voice and move slowly toward the door.

Do not startle the buffistas.

Q. I've been re-reading posts about "Fool for Love" and "Darla" and noticed copious use of the word 'retcon.' What chew talkin bout, Willis?
A. Retcon is an abbreviation for retroactive continuity. Retcon is when writers to tie up loose ends by creating a past which almost certainly wasn't imagined at the time the original story was told, but which now offers a semi-rational backstory. It's a legitimate form of writerly creativity, but is somewhat disdained by Comic Book Guy type fans. Actually, it is a term that comes out of comic book fandom, and it was originally applied to such situations as Captain America not dying at the end of WWII but actually having been frozen in a block of ice until the 1960s so that he could show up as a contemporary Marvel Comics character.

Q. Post cereal?
A. First it was serial post -- an explanatory note made by a poster when he or she put one post immediately after another, even though he or she could just edit that first post. Serial post became post serial, and then it became post cereal, and now it's grape nuts. You can expand the oeuvre with the following official Post brand cereals: Alpha-Bits, Cocoa Pebbles, Shredded Wheat, et al.

Q. What's the deal with BuffyNAngle4Evah!!!?
A. BuffiNAngle4Evah!!! is a parody of the sort of thing people Not Like Us say. It's a way of saying "Yes, I am unalterably committed to the Buffy/Angel relationship being Eternal, and yes, I am well aware of how silly this makes me look." in a compact fashion. It saves us all an argument. And, you know, everybody on the internet is a bad speller.

Q. OCM? Hmm?
A. Operant Conditioning Militia. Name for the Initiative when it was clear it had something to do with psychology professor Walsh but before we knew it was called the Initiative.

Q. Hey, who or what is a CoW?
A. Council of Watchers. The big jerks.

Q. Who's KoB?
A. The Knights of Byzantium, another mildly fascist, patriarchial group of knuckleheads. Key seekers. Annoying. Refugees from a Monty Python sketch. You know, the KoB.

Q. And the KoB are led by General Forehead, I presume?
A. Yes, Mr. Big Facial Tattoo is General Forehead, formally known as Gregor.

Q. What's the CVR?
A. CVR is short for Canadian Violence Ratings. The folks in Eastern Canada get Buffy on Monday, a day ahead of everyone else, and Betsy asked if they report on any really scary episodes so she could know to cover the eyes of her little ones. So late Monday, the nice people from the North let us know if there are any particularly spectacular beheadings, upsetting character deaths or frightening bumpy-headed things in the night. These are personal opinions and are not necessarily shared by the majority of the Canadian people, nor by the Canadian government.

Q. Hey, who or what is a DH, SO, GF, BF?
A. Dear husband, significant other, girlfriend and boyfriend, respectively.

Q. What's with the exclamation points in stuff like ShitTogether!Xander and Mopey!Buffy?
A. According to Dana D., it's something originated in other fandoms, especially those that have a lot of fanfic. It's used to describe a commonly seen variety of a character; we usually apply it to a particular trait or dimension of a character, such as Catty!Willow.

Q. What is filk?
A. Buffy-based folklore, this mutant strain of writing creates parodies of the two shows by mixing them with other well-known fictions. (© Anya G.)

Q. Someone told me to join FFANG? F-f-what?
A. Fans For A Naked Gunn. You know you want it. (Tim, are you listening?!)

Q. NAFDA? Is that an international Buffista treaty?
A. Ummm..... No. It's the North American Free Discussion Area. We have many posters who aren't from North America and are therefore half a season or more behind. In order to keep them unspoiled, we limit discussion of current episodes to specific threads. These are the NAFDA threads. If it's not labeled as a NAFDA thread, don't talk about current episodes in it. We also ask that you don't discuss one show's current season in another show's topic without whitefont, because some people are on tape delay. This means that events from the current season of Buffy should be whitefonted in the Angel topic and vice versa.

James Q. What's foamy?
A. Well, James Marsters, for one thing.

Madrigal Costello - B.3.7325: "I thought foamy came from the end of 'Beer, Bad' when Xander asked, 'What have we all learned about beer?' and Buffy gleefully squealed, 'Foamy!' The word is used to express things that prompt that kind of unthinking joy."

Erin Griggs - B.3.9020: "And now for something completely different... I propose a social experiment. Let's try to get 'foamy' into the mainstream of slang. It can be used for sexy or hot. Start using it for sexy, non-BTVS or Angel guys and see how soon it pops up in either 1) any movie with Freddie Prinze, Jr., or Kristen Dunst or 2) popular magazines. Report back."

Betsy Hanes Perry - B.3.9026: "Foamy isn't just used for sexy; it is also used for anything one strongly approves of. (I believe I'm not the only TTart who uses it this way.) Raspberries are foamy."

Holly Loth - B.3.9031: "Foamy = all things of the good, with overtones of sensual (or sensuous? I never remember). Raspberries are indeed foamy, and so is Xander (IMHO), but, for instance, The Matrix, quality of the picture notwithstanding, is not foamy, nor is someone we admire but wouldn't want to see in leather pants, like, say, Ralph Nader."

Erin Griggs - B.3.9034: "And as much as I hate to differ (and believe me, I fought a long internal battle on this one, hating Keanu Reeves as I do) Keanu and Lawrence Fishburne in The Matrix are, indeed, foamy. However, even in leather, Keanu in Much Ado About Nothing is not foamy..."

Dana D. - B.3.9036: "I thought The Matrix was pretty foamy, myself. However, The Talented Mr. Ripley, which I saw this weekend and adored, I wouldn't call foamy. I think foamy implies a certain... lightheartedness."

First contextual occurrence? Seems to be:

Deborah Grabien - B.2.2931: "Maybe it's a girl thing, but watching her deck Parker not once but twice, watching her sniff Xander (boy smells...good), watching the lovely subtle way Joss brought it home to us that the slayer skills are atavistic, not learned, watching all their tilted heads as they stared down at decked-for-the-second-time Parker, the fact that most of this season's iconic quips in our household came from that episode (well, also from PANGS)...all in all, BEER BAD made this cave-slayer, well...FOAMY."

Second? Oo! We have a pattern. Someday the OED can blame Tracey Forbes and Deborah Grabien.

Deborah Grabien - B.2.3028: "Daniel D-L in buckskins in MOHICANS...foamy. No, wait, ME foamy..."

Q. What's NGA?
A. Not Getting Any. Astonishingly, this title applies to some of the foamiest Buffistas. Clearly, they've learned the lessons of the Jossverse well --- sex is evil.

Q. What's an HSQ?
A. Holy Shit Quotient, a term invented by David S. Refers to the moments when you go, "Holy shit, I can't believe they did that!" The second season of both Buffy and Angel had a heavy HSQ. Notable examples are Buffy sending Angel to hell and Dru revamping Darla.

Q. What's IIRC?
A. If I recall correctly.

Q. What's NATLBSB?
A. Not a tagline but should be.

Q. What's YMMV?
A. Your mileage may vary, meaning, you may see things differently.

Q. What's YBMV?
A. Your beagle may vary. It comes from the following lunge and parry:

Tim Minear - A.3.3246: "My beagle went swimming today and now he's typing on my keyboard with his ample nose. Oh, and he's the bestest handsomeest beagle EVER."

David J. Schwartz - A.3.3302: "I don't know if I believe that Tim has a beagle. I have a beagle and he doesn't swim. YBMV. (That's Your Beagle May Vary, in case you're heading for the FAQ.)"

Q. BRQG? Buff Diving?
A. Funny you should ask. The Buffista Random Quote Generator (BRQG) is a collection of the wit and wisdom of Buffistas through the years. Well, maybe it's more like snark and snerk, but you get the idea. Reading the BRQG is known as Buff Diving, and you can try it out here. Warning: quotes may be spoilery for people who haven't seen the current episodes, but it will not be spoilery for anything that has not aired in the US.

Q. Wrod?
A. Wrod, my man, wrod. (See, it's like 'word,' except misspelled. "I go on-line sometimes, but everyone has really bad spelling. It's depressing.")

Q. Timelies? When?
A. "Timelies" is a multi-time-zone-friendly greeting for our poly-time-zone community. It evolved from "Good Morning/Day/Afternoon/Evening/Night!" into "Timely Greetings!" and eventually the simple "Timelies" you see being used on the board today.

Q. Doblerize?
A. In Say Anything, the hero, Lloyd Dobler, confronts a friend who is drunk and being difficult. Dobler gets in his face and shouts "You. Must. Chill!" So to Doblerize is to tell somebody (possibly yourself) to calm down and step away from the ugly bag.

Q. M.E.?
A. M.E. is short for Mutant Enemy, Joss Whedon's production company. Grr, argh. The producers and writers of Buffy and Angel are sometimes referred to as Mutant Enemies.

Q: And what do MoG and Fang Gang mean?
A: Same description, different show. MoG stands for Ministers of Grace and refers to Cordelia, Wesley, and Gunn. The term is taken from a line in Hamlet, "Angels and ministers of grace, defend us." (Spoken by Hamlet when approached by the Ghost of his father, the King.) Television Without Pity (aka TWoP) uses it in its recaps, and we've picked it up. Fang Gang is another shorthand for Angel, Cordy and friends. The first Fang Gang were The Three, a group of warrior vampires sent to kill Buffy. Angel saved her, they hid in her house, he spent the night, the rest is history, blah blah blah. When sharp-toothed Angel got his own gang, fans adapted the name.

Q. Who is BBoC and what does she want with Spike?
A: Big Block of Concrete, aka Concrete Block... Sometime during Season 5, an inspired Bronzer named Amy said "If they told James Marsters that his new love interest was a cement block, he would have chemistry with the cement block. We would all be Spike/Cement Block shippers, and there would be a S/CB fic list, and whenever JM looked at the block just so, we would all post things like, 'Whoa, Cement Block looked hot tonight.'" We leapt on the phrase with glee. "The BBoC factor" is a reference to the fact that James Marsters can generate chemistry with anything. Even Riley.

Q. Who are Fuffy and Baith?
A. In the Season 4 episode "Who Are You?" Faith used a magic widget to put her personality in Buffy's body, and visa versa. To keep the switch straight, we refer to Faith's-personality-in-Buffy's-body as Fuffy, and Buffy's-personality-in-Faith's-body as Baith.

Q. Who's the GGG?
A. The (ex-)Host of the karaoke bar Caritas. The demon that can read your aura when you sing. You know, the Gay Green Guy, the artist formerly known as Krevlornswath of the Deathwok Clan.

Q. Schmuck bait? Schmuck bait arms? What the heck are you maniacs talking about?
A. Well, schmuck bait is a term which often appears in the shooting scripts, defined thusly by BtVS writer Steven DeKnight, "'Schmuck bait' is a term, I believe, used when we roll out a classic horror gonna get'cha moment. Usually used when a trap is about to be sprung by the Big Nasties. Our hero is the Schmuck, the trap is the bait, hence 'Schmuck Bait.' Schmuck Bait Arms is something of a shout-out to our patron saint, Tim Minear, who used the term in a Cordy-Skilosh scene in "Epiphany."

Q: What's the difference between shooting scripts and transcripts?
A: Transcripts are transcribed from what was actually broadcast. They are written by fans and occasionally contain inaccuracies, but Joerg is good about fixing errors brought to his attention. As such they are the best source from which to determine canon. Shoooting scripts are written by the actual Buffy and Angel writers. They often contain bits of dialog or entire scenes that were not broadcast, due to time constraints, continuity issues, etc. Shooting scripts also contain the writers' witty stage directions. They're steadicam-a-licious.

Q. Who the heck is Cousin Clingon?
A. Landok of the Deathwok Clan, the Host's cousin, looks and acts disturbingly like a Klingon warrior from Star Trek, thus the alliterative sobriquet.

Q. Slash? That sounds kind of dangerous. Should I get out of the way?
A. Slash is the term for same-gender romantic or sexual pairings in fanfiction. So a Wesley/Angel, or Xander/Spike, or Buffy/Faith relationship is slash-y, to name a few popular fanfic couples.

Q. What's a TCBITW?
A. Gudanov's daughter is the cutest baby in the world. The baby Darla tempted Angel with in China is the second cutest baby in the world.

Q. And UST?
A. UST stands for unresolved sexual tension.

Q. I am intrigued -- what the hellmouth is a "wildfeed"?
A. The ultimate device of pleasure for spoiler whores. People with dishes get the broadcast satellite wild feed for Buffy on Sunday mornings. A few of these kind people (pushers) write very detailed descriptions of episodes on Sunday morning.

Q. "I'm [x]ing right now, and it's fucking great!" Huh?!
A. In March of 2002 the inimitable Fayjay said (Bitches.4.1559):

See, we just illustrated the glorious affirmative process that is online communities.

Person A: <sheepishly/shamefully> I...I kinda like to wear rubber gloves on my head and pretend to be a chicken. Sometimes. Er. For a laugh, you know?

Person B: I do that every weekend.

Person C: I'm wearing a rubber glove on my head right now and it's fucking great! Those non-rubber-glove-wearers (henceforth to be called NRGW) don't know what they're missing!

Person A: Yeah!

Person B: Let's set up our own forum at World Crossing.


Q. Are y'all porn freaks or something?
A. It's not our fault. Blame Joss. Here, look at what he says: "I have never spanked my creations. And by never I mean seldom, and by seldom I mean porn."

Q. What is the plural of apocalypse, anyhow? Apocalypti? Apocalypses? Apocalypotumus?
A. Many people think there isn't a right answer, others stand by apocalypses. In any case, it's probably rather traumatic and flamey.

History:
Q. I just started watching the shows. How do I catch up on five years of backstory?
A. Try BuffyGuide.com - The Complete BtVS Episode Guide, AngelGuide: The Screening Room, or one of the Buffy reference books like The Watcher's Guide - Volume 1, The Sunnydale High Yearbook, The Monster Book, The Watcher's Guide - Volume 2, or, oh, yes, ask us. If you've got a LOT of time on your hands.

Q. What's up with threads from Table Talk?
Originally the structural limit of a Table Talk thread was supposed to be about 2000 posts, but the Buffistas just kept going and going through 4000. After new software was installed, the first thread was archived and the second thread created. After the new software install, Table Talk threads were able to reach 10,000 posts. Then we were on World Crossing where there was technically no post ceiling, but it became traditional to euthanize a thread at 10,000. Then WX decided, for the sake of their database, that all threads needed to be cut off at 3,000 posts, which is when we really started blowing through threads.
Thread Title Dates Time Period Posts
"Buffy the Vampire Slayer": Am I the Only "Watcher"? May 19, 1997 to September 28, 1999 Two years, four months 4014
Buffy: The Continuation September 23, 1999 to March 13, 2000 Seven months 10018
Buffy, the neverending story March 13, 2000 to August 24, 2000 Six months 10021
The Slayer, The Witch and Their Wardrobes Buffy Part 4 August 24, 2000 to December 12, 2000 Five months 10173
Buffy 5x5: And by '5' we mean 'porn'. December 12, 2000 to March 1, 2001 Four months 10114
Buffy 6: In Joss We Trust February 28, 2001 to April 24, 2001 Eight weeks 10012
Buffy 7: Counting Down from 7-3-0 April 24, 2001 to June 20, 2001 Eight weeks 10294
Buffy 8: We Mock You With Our Monkey Pants June 20, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Angel September 21, 1999 to November 16, 2000 One year, two months 10010
Angel 2: "It's all about the coat." November 15, 2000 to March 27, 2001 Five months 10069
Angel 3: "The Schmuck Bait Arms" March 26, 2001 to July 2, 2001 Three months 10126
Angel 4: Three times and you still have your soul? We'll go again. July 2, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Buffy & Angel SPOILER Discussion July 4, 2000 to Present Ongoing TBD
Unamerican Buffista Support Thread September 26, 2000 to Present Ongoing TBD
The Quotable Buffy June 19, 1999 to Present Ongoing TBD
The Quotable "Angel" October 6, 1999 to Present Ongoing TBD
Spike's Bitch November 16, 2000 to Present Ongoing TBD
Buffista Bureaucracy December 5, 2000 to August 14, 2001 Nine months 4429

Q. What's up with threads from World Crossing?
A. Originally WX was just a backup, so we duplicated thread titles directly. Keeping with the 10,000 ceiling, Buffy 6, for example, on WX, lasted long after it's predecessor on TT. When TT finally committed hari-kari, and we hit 10,000 on a WX, we started new thread numbering from where we'd been on TT. Confused? Yeah, us too.
Thread Title Dates Time Period Posts
Buffy 6: In Joss We Trust April 17, 2001 to October 30, 2001 Seven months 10024
Buffy 9: Once More, With Braiiiiiiiins October 30, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Angel 3: The Schmuck Bait Arms April 17, 2001 to November 19, 2001 Eight months 10017
Angel 5: I Almost Forgot To Brood November 19, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Natter / Table Talk Status April 3, 2001 to September 19, 2001 Six months 14060
Wouldn't you like to be a Natter 2 September 19, 2001 to November 16, 2001 Two months 10653
Natter 3: Natter Abhors a Vacuum November 16, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Buffista Bureaucracy April 17, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Buffistaville: Sang Sacre October 25, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Buffy Backstory September 24, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Unamerican Buffista Support Thread April 17, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
The Jossverse in Other Media June 6, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Buffy & Angel SPOILER Discussion April 17, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
The Atlantic Canadian Monday Madness Discussion April 17, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Spike's Bitch April 17, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Lust Bureaucracy July 25, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Buffyverse Fanfiction September 19, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD
Literary Buffistas! August 24, 2001 to Present Ongoing TBD

Q. Why do you have so many threads?
A. Because we need them. Step off! Oh, okay, fine. Actually, for each show there is a main thread, a quotable thread, and numerous past threads archived in the TT or WX attic for passing 10,000 posts. There's a spoiler thread for those ahead of everyone, and an Unamerican thread for those behind everyone. There's "Jossverse in Other Media" to discuss Buffy books, musics and comics. There's "Buffista Bureaucracy" to take care of administratrivia, a Natter thread for guilt-free thread drift, a "Buffy Backstory" to discuss old episodes of Buffy rebroadcast in syndication and a lust thread for Spike because that takes up a lot of space. And sometimes we need other threads for special projects, like planning a F2F or producing Buffista merchandise. You gotta problem with that?

Q: I'd like to find this really cool post someone made about Glory being lame a few months ago. Do I have to look through all those threads?
A: Maybe, maybe not. The Buffistas have their very own search engine, but it only searches Table Talk posts up through Buffy 6. Go to http://www.ofthegood.net for details on how to sign up for a password and use the engine. And remember to thank Tom Kr for his work on it. If you can't find what you're looking for there, you might try Nillyland. And if that doesn't help, ask. Chances are, someone will remember what you're talking about and know where to find it.

Q. So can I read older threads in the Television Attic at Table Talk or in the Archives folder on World Crossing?
A. Yes. OR you can download (this is much easier BTW) zipped whole threads from DX Machina's most wondrous thread archive. Threadsucked by DX and company for your reading and researching pleasure.

Q. Who do I email if I want my filk archived?
A. Email DXMachina at DXMachina@martzmountain.com or filk@buffistas.org with the filk, your Buffistas.org name and the original source. He'll post it as soon as he has some time.

Q. You guys have a filk archive?
A. Yep. Check it out at http://filk.buffistas.org/

Q. I'm interested in seeing what the Buffistas said about a particular episode. Any ideas?
A. Check out Nillytown, the thread devoted to just that topic.

Traditional Costumes:
Q. Is it true there's symbolism associated with leather pants?
A. Yes. Please print out and laminate the following wallet-sized guide for future reference.
Leather Pants Reference
Canonical - Version 1.1
By Liese S.
Black Leather Pants Evil
Pleather Pants Plevil (TM Holli)
Brown Leather Pants Almost Eviltude
Pink Leather Pants Dracula Thrall
Green Leather Pants Seduction
Purple Leather Pants F*ck Me, Please
Red Leather Pants Moral Ambiguity

Q. Hey, exactly which "everyone" was the GGG speaking of when he said, "I think I'm speaking for everyone when I say, if all you're going to do is switch back to brood mode we'd rather have you evil. Then, at least, leather pants."?
A. The "everyone" that's the TT Buffistas. We rule! TIM: Oh, and "leather pants," yes -- shout out to TT. Q. Any other symbolic garments or accessories I should know about?
A. When they are being bad-ass, Angel represents with the Swooping Garments of Righteousness and Buffy sports the Stern Ponytail of Righteous Indignation. Also, wearing tweed means you're English.

Q. Does Gunn have a traditional costume?
A. Yes. Clothes! I mean, really. If you too oppose this constant state of shirtedness, please consider a generous donation to your local chapter of FFANG.

Famous Citizens:

Q. Is that really Tim Minear?
A. Damn right it is.

Q. Did you know it's My-near, not Min-ear?
A. Nope, we didn't. But now we do. Thanks.

Q. Is jengod really a goddess?
A. We like to think so. She was the mistress of the original Buffista web pages on Geocities, the impetus behind our multiple redundancies, has divine knowledge of the industry, and is incredibly quick with a shooting script quote. And have you seen her interview with Andy Hallett? If she's a goddess, though, she's the lovely, modest and benevolent type, not a bimbo Hellgoddess.

Q. How does Nilly manage to find just about any quote, post or article within minutes?
A. We aren't sure. Nilly protests that she has to be so organised on paper because she is otherwise so disorganised. We can only boggle at her prodigious photographic memory. After every new episode, Nilly is kind enough to gather links to the beginning of the discussion, so she's got her own thread, Nillytown.

Q. Is there any earthly explanation for Betsy?
A. No. We think it has something to do with good fairies.

Q. ita? ITA!? Where the hell are you, ita?
A. Shh. Calm down! Jeez. ITA is 'I totally agree.' ita, at whom you should not shout, is this unspeakably cool chick who likes knives and built the Phoenix Board by willpower alone. She is a 'charming Jamaican/Canadian/British thang' and we all want her and want to be her.

Q. Why is Hellish so bloodthirsty?
A. We're not entirely sure, but if you mentally block out his knee-jerk proclamations that "Faith/Tara/Dawn must die!!!" he's had some interesting things to say.

Q. Mejia?
A. A shot-by-shot summary of a teaser, promo, or "Previously on..." Named in honor of Jeff Mejia, who generally posts these the day after airing, and who once Mejia'd the entire five-season, 192-shot "Previously on..." from "The Gift." Looking for a specific Mejia? Check out Mejiaville.

Q. meara?
A. A meara (so called after the meara, because of her habit of mearaing, and in recognition of some of her prodigious mearas of yore, and hopefully the rest of this explanation will allow you to map all that back onto English) is a catch-up post containing multiple responses to previous posts. So, for instance, if you come back to the Natter thread to find 300 posts have been made in your absence, you go through them all and have responses to six of them, and you put them all into the same post - that post's a meara. And an accomplishment, which is why they deserve their own brand name.

Q. Shriftweb? Seems like I see that domain a lot. What's the deal?
A. Shriftweb is the domain of our very own Shrift. She hosts the BRQG, a BTVS fic archive, as well as other cool stuff that she might tell you about if you ask really nicely. Basically, she rocks, and spends more time creating stuff that we love than is probably good for her.


Q. Who are Manservant Hecubus and Knut the Difficult?
A. Dana started it. We have quite a few David-type people and Dana noted this on the thread, and proceeded to rename the offending Davids. David Schwartz became Knut the Difficult, David S. became Manservant Hecubus. Hilarity ensued.

Here's how it went down:

Dana D. - B.3.650: David Rothschild (we have entirely too many Davids around here, between Smay, Schwartz, and Rothschild. I demand that two of you rename yourselves to Lucien and Joshua), I *loved* that movie. Bloody brilliant stuff. [The movie in question was Being John Malkovich.]

David S. - B.3.651: I apologize sincerely for my Davidness and hereby rename myself Dana.

David J. Schwartz - B.3.661: Lucien? Joshua? No. I prefer to be called by my viking sobriquet, Knut Hoarfrost.

Susan O - B.3.672: So who is Joshua and who is Lucien? And can we all join in a chorus of "These are the Daves I Know" from the Kids in the Hall?

Dana D. - B.3.673: Well, David Schwartz insisted on being difficult, so now he's Knut.

Valarie Cook - B.3.689: (De-lurking) so David Swartz is now going to be known as Knut the Difficult?

Dana D. - B.3.690: I like it. So it is written, so shall it be.

David S. - B.3.692: Well, I'm damn sure not going to be Lucien. If David Schwartz gets to be Knut the Difficult, then I want to be Manservant Hecubus.

Character Worship & Other Religions:
Aly Q. Why is Willow so well-liked?
A. There are several theories. One is that many Buffistas identify with Willow's social awkwardness and shyness, especially in the high school years. Another is that Willow's near-genius aptitude for all things is representative of the high median intelligence of the self-effacing Buffistas. And then there are those of us who just want to make sweet love to her while Barry White plays in the background.

Q. Um, excuse me, it's Season 6. Where the hell does Giles think he's going?!?
A. Anthony Stewart Head has long expressed his desire to live full-time with his significant other and two daughters in England. As of Season 6 he is no longer a regular on Buffy but is expected to return now and again as a special guest star, and may get his own show on BBC, called The Watcher.

Q. Sometimes I'm lost and confused about things like Angel's hair and why this season's arc is so upsetting. When I need help, where should I turn?
A. First, child, ask yourself, "what Buffy would do?" Then, take some time to commune with our God. Many communicants find comfort in prayer. Try this one.

And as I walk through the Valley of the Shadow of Gossip,
I will fear no Spoiler; for Joss is with me;
His wit and fierce emotion shall comfort me;
He gives me great TV in the presence of wrestling and Big Brother;
He anoints my Tuesdays with Willow and Wesley,
my laughter and tears overflow;
Surely Joss will sustain me all the days of my TV watching
And I will follow his career forever. Amen.
(By the right reverend Eli Harvey.)

Or, you could repeat this soothing phrase over and over:

"There is no God but Joss, and Minear is his prophet."
Q. Exactly whom do I bribe/blackmail/kill around here for a decent tape recording of Buffy? I mean, exactly how hard can this possibly be?!
A. Hey, hey, slow down. Appease the gods before you do something as risky as program a VCR to tape Buffy. Expression your devotion, show your respect --- pray, my child. Always turn to prayer in times of trouble and doubt.

Caroma's VCR Prayer
Attention all religious people, established or not, pagan or Wiccan or Bible Belt or Jewish or Bead Jiggler (like me): Please pray to the VCR gods tonight for all of us who are Unavoidably Unable To Be Home. May the cable systems all remember. May the tapes be fresh and have plenty of space. May our power not brown out and reset the VCR clocks. May kids and SOs and stray kittens not wander by and reset the apparatii. May our UPN affiliates not fold, spindle, or mutilate the show with weird crawls, ads for other inane shows, sports, or teasers for the Ten o'clock News. May we all come home to Buffy, just Buffy and purest Buffy, from Previously to the previews. Amen.

Q. You're a cult, aren't you?
A. Why, yes, yes we are. We have weird cultish names. We use a vocabulary incomprehensible to non-members. We consider ourselves smarter, funnier, and wiser than non-initiates. We are focused on a living leader towards whom members display excessively zealous, unquestioning commitment.

Q. Don't you people have lives?
A. Life is what happens between new episodes of Buffy.

Q. How many Buffistas does it take to screw in a light-bulb? [PersephoneMoon - TT.QB.1768]
A. Seven. One to screw it in and six to debate whether full spectrum light bulbs would give vamps a rash. [Jon B - TT.QB.1769]
A. Plus one more to set up a poll on which kind of light bulb to use. [David J. Schwartz - TT.QB.1770]
A. No. One to set up a poll to decide on a title for the "Would Full-Spectrum Light Bulbs Give Vampires a Rash In The Jossverse" Table Talk thread. [Jon B - TT.QB.1771]
A. And another to set up the threads, "The Lantern, the Torch, and their Lampshades," "Bulbista Bureaucracy," and "Torchiere&Halojen4EVAH!" [DXMachina - TT.QB.1772]
A. Twenty-one. One to set up a poll on what to title the light bulb-changing ceremony. Two to research which high-efficiency light bulb will encourage more people to de-lurk. Three to blame Anya, Tara and/or Dawn for letting the light bulb burn out in the first place. Four to sob that Joyce will never again change a light bulb. Five to rhapsodize about how hot Spike would look changing the light bulb. And six to complain about how the new light bulb isn't as exciting as the light bulbs from the earlier seasons. [David J. Schwartz - TT.QB.1773]

Q. So how do I suggest additions to this FAQ?
A. Visit the Buffista Bureaucracy thread and post your serious or snarky question and answer.
All things Buffy (and Buffista) on the Web, in a handy list format:
Buffista Links
The filkiest filk to be filked is filked here:
filk.buffistas.org