What shrift said, Gud. You need to look after yourself, because if you don't, you can't help anyone else either. Please be kind to yourself.

I gave up and bought bread for Sunday dinner with the family, but the tarte tatin came out very tasty, even if it's not all that attractive. Just a kind of dull brown thing. [link]

My niece made a very tasty arugula pesto, which we had with homemade whole wheat pasta. Nom. Now I have to pay my bills and go to bed, oy.

Consuela I love that your family has Sunday dinner together and everyone brings something homemade and delicious. Such a blessing. As I said, I think Sundays can be difficult and it's lovely to see a tradition that goes against all that.

Sundays can be difficult, and I don't always want to go to dinner. But it is a good way to get me out of my house and my own head, and catch up with the nieces and my sister & BIL. I hope my dad can stabilize well enough to be able to come over again soon.

And simple meals are a lot easier with many hands, in my sister's big kitchen where three or four people can be working, even with 175 lbs of dog underfoot.

And now I'm really going to bed.

Belated comment on Bungalow court. Note that it was built in 1922 and requires "TLC" (Tender Loving Care). In short, in awful shape. You either have to spend more to repair it than the rents are worth, or have enough of a heart of stone to evict tenants who have been there forever so you can tear it down.

What shrift, said, Gud. I think you could use more of an outside perspective.

This makes me think of ita, just because she would have gotten it and then found a reason to wear it.

You know, that's right. ita just would have worn it somewhere.

So, I waded into a political discussion on Facebook (clearly a mistake!), and someone just posted, "I want to live like they do in Vermont. Clean meat and dairy, fresh air and solar panels everywhere..." Sure, I'm sure that's both accurate for Vermont and doable for the whole country. Just put the bad stuff Somewhere Else. @@

Thanks.

Hey, Gud. It sounds like you're really in need of some self-care right now. I'm not sure what kind of support system you have in your life, but I suspect you don't have what you need.

I don't really have a support system and I'm not sure what self-care means.

I don't know how to convince you that you can't live up to an impossible standard. It sounds like you're responsible for everything in your household, which is unfair and unsustainable unless you're a single parent or live by yourself.

I'm not responsible for everything. My wife shuttles kids to appointments, takes care of school stuff, gets on them to do homework, manages pills, and does some cleaning. I take care of a bunch of stuff, but it's not everything. It just fills up all my time. Right now I'm also working on some software for a study my wife will be conducting for school so I'm especially pressed for time.

Have you thought about talking to a therapist?

I'm not sure what that would accomplish. My main problems seem to be making too many mistakes and not getting things done faster.

I made another screw-up this morning. Well, actually last week. I paid a credit-card too late and it looks like it'll arrive a day late. I got busy and took care of the bills too late which is a typical mistake for me. I hate the way I make mistakes. I swear the world would be a lot better off without me.

Have you thought about talking to a therapist?

I'm not sure what that would accomplish.

For one thing, when you say things like "I swear the world would be a lot better off without me.", you know that's not a healthy -- or true -- statement, right? A therapist can help you with that.

The world would certainly not be better off without you! And also paying a bill one day late is such a minor mistake it shouldn't cause you more than a moment's bad-feeling.

I take care of a bunch of stuff, but it's not everything. It just fills up all my time.

You also work full time. I'm with Steph in not being able to imagine how people with kids manage things.

I don't want to pile on, but you should never be thinking that the world would be better without you. Would you want any of us to say the same thing?