as in someone coming in to help them during the day

Yeah, they already have someone for a couple of hours 4 days/week, but we want to ramp it up. For one thing, it breaks up the dynamic of just the two of them--Dad finds it draining to be Mom's only social outlet, and she flies off the handle really easily.

But she's demented and anxious and paranoid and terrified, so her instinctive reaction to everything is "NO." It took months to get her settled with the original PA, and now we want to add more. So fucking hard. As soon as they left last night, my sister broke out the scotch.

On the touch, so spare with words , but remember mine was the first or second house I saw. Had an offer accepted in under a week... Just saying!

To be fair, he's also a hardass about bad pasta and bad risotto.

Indeed!

Ugh, that must be so hard, Consuela. Is there anything to be done with meds about her anxiety and paranoia?

Sarameg is a BAD influence!

I already emailed my realtor, asking him to call me. I did discover that the house is on a domestic well, and not the city water supply, so I have to look into that more, especially in terms of resale value.

I'm trying to remember what I know about wells, Perkins. Someone I know had one. Let me think.

Scotch seems warranted, Consuela. I'm sorry it's so tough to deal with your mom. For what it's worth, it must feel pretty crappy to her, too, to be that anxious and upset all the time.

Is there anything to be done with meds about her anxiety and paranoia?

Oh, she is so medicated already. In fact, that's one of her paranoias, that someone will interfere with her access to her meds! Which of course makes her more anxious and then she wants more medication...

I just heard from someone over the weekend that when their power was out for several days recently, so was the water, due to having a well.

Oh, she is so medicated already. In fact, that's one of her paranoias, that someone will interfere with her access to her meds! Which of course makes her more anxious and then she wants more medication...

Yeah, there's a lot of that. I just have heard stories about people finally getting the right combo and it being magic (and other stories about that never happening, so...).

For what it's worth, it must feel pretty crappy to her, too, to be that anxious and upset all the time.

Oh, my, yes. I do feel bad for her: she's clearly pretty miserable, but there's nothing I can do. The things that would make her feel better (like exercise and therapy) she wouldn't do when she was able to, and now it's too late. She's spent her life saying, "No," to things, and now it's caught up with her.

I sound unsympathetic: I kind of have to be, in order to deal with her at all. She's my mother and I do love her, but I've had to disengage from her emotionally.