I am proud of myself. I have had a stressful two days.
Dad's out of the hosptial but there was a whole thing where I heard that he really did have a heart attack, then no, he didn't and I guess the doctors are split. And he was going to stay over night and then no they were going to release him.
Plus there was some problems with a doctor's referal that took numerous phone calls. And I was tired. And I get home, and oh. Internet problems.
Oh and my period started.
The internet problems are temporarily solved.
But I'm proud of myself because I only got a bit teary once. I didn't berate myself or get down on myself.
I'm going to say that part of it is giving myself a 3 day weekend. But also I'm going to say part of it is the Strettera. Because not only am I not forgetting things but I'm noticing other changes. Like I've been able to organize some stuff on my computer, where before I was going in circles and today at work I figured otu what I needed to do. Also I've noticed I'm not seeking extra stimulation all the time, either from sneaking in computer games at work because there's nothing to do and I can't handle the nothing or having a million tabs open and doing a million different things.
Probably not very helpful to keep up a steady stream of body-hate while doing so. But I still don't know how to shut it off.
Yeah. But maybe the third time you do it, or the sixth, the voices will shut off? Or not really shut off, but be drowned out by the 'I made a plan to do this and I did it', 'and then I kept on doing it' voice.
{{{Askye}}} I'm sorry you are having such a rough week. It is stressful when the parents have health problems, especially when they are undefined. But it is good to hear that the Strattera is helping you.
Thanks everyone for the encouragement.
Say, erin_o, any word on your feline?
Oh right! I meant to snark about Twilight, Edward and the sparkly urine, but my head exploded and I couldn't make it work.
Gronk. Taking care of drunk people is tiring. But I slept for a while this evening, and now I can't get to sleep again. And I need to get some sleep, because I need to be awake tomorrow so that I can finish the work I should have done today.
I need Hivemind help.
Towards the end of the day at work some people in the office were joking around while I was on the phone, I got an email where someone had pretended to be one of the new supervisors at the helpdesk and sent a couple of wacky emails "I did not lock my computer, and I love teletubbies" and "I love fish sticks!" variety.
I got off the phone and heard fish sticks mentioned, and punned, "Remember, if you throw it against the wall, fish sticks."
This got a laugh, and a guy from the next department on the other side of the cube wall stood up and yelled at me, "What the FUCK is wrong with you?"
It all seemed a bit overboard, and everyone laughed, and I laughed.
In retrospect, some hours later, it occurs to me that the guys around me may have been making some lewd comments that I did not hear, and that my pun may have been thought of to be part of that conversation, and therefore very wrong.
What can I do to stop the possible repercussions in the morning? I am beside myself to think that I may have inadvertently offended someone deeply enough to get fired over this. What can I do, where can I turn, what do I say?
Part of me thinks the above statement with a couple of modest edits should be given to one of Daniel's supervisors - but possibly not in written form. And/or that the strategy to take the with guy who said "WTF is wrong with you?" is to very simply say, "A few hours after that convo, it occurred to me that "fish sticks" might have meant something other than the obvious. If so, ew, sorry." But then leave it at that. Because the more you explain yourself, the more it sounds like you are protesting too much.
The other alternative would be to play innocent of the possible innuendo, and stage a "Christopher Judge finds out about furries" moment. Because making them explain the other guys' crudity could theoretically take the heat off you.
