I have zero interest in the culture than 99% of the guys in Seattle are interested in, and they have zero interest in mine (gaming, computers, literature, INTELLIGENCE).

A gay friend once complained to me wistfully about being attacked by a cliche, saying "All the guys I've met recently are neat and like show tunes."

I have had maybe three traditional dates in my life. I had two relationships in college, was married for 13 years and have had one year-long relationship-ish thing in the last two decades. I'm terrible at meeting strangers; I work at home; and I'm overweight and geeky. I don't really see much potential there.

A gay friend once complained to me wistfully about being attacked by a cliche, saying "All the guys I've met recently are neat and like show tunes."

That's exactly it. I'm either the freak they can tell stories about later, or someone to "fix".

That's exactly it. I'm either the freak they can tell stories about later, or someone to "fix".

Oh, ewww. Bad gay boys, no biscuit.

I was watching some sort of Big Brother-esque show, and one of the guys was a stereotypical flaming gay guy. The girls adored him and the other guys gave him odd looks. Including the other gay guy, who debated for quite a while about telling the other guys that he was gay. He finally did so while they were at a sports bar watching a football game. The straight guys were baffled and uncertain for a while, until one said, "You mean there are four girls in the house and only two straight guys? Dude!"

connie, I've never understood why straight guys don't react to gay guys by saying, "More girls for me!"

Ginger, you and me, babe. You and me.

I've always viewed every attractive gay guy as a blessing. One less to worry about.

I had precisely one close friend (my closest straight male friend - known him for almost 30 years now) go through a period of about 18 months where he had to re-evaluate every conversation we'd ever had to parse it for hidden come-ons from me.

(No. I never even ONCE thought about it. He's a nice, smart, goodlooking guy - and just no. Ew.)

I was very angry while he did this; we didn't speak. However, it was his meltdown, not mine, so it was his to fix, not my responsibility.

Eventually, he went, "Screw that. Duh." and has been my best straight male friend to this day.

But, in my experience, most straight guys at least run that internal gauntlet for a few seconds/minutes every time a closeted gay guy comes out around them.

"Dude, was he hitting on me when he said my guns were big?"

Gah. This culture. I swear.

I must be the odd one. I had a great time dating for years and really had no plans to stop doing it. Then Kristin came along. She is just way too much of a partner in crime along with being dead sexy and everything else I could ask for, hence the staying with her and now getting married.

I haven't had a date in ages but it's not like I'm going to start now. "Hi, I'm unemployed! Wanna go for coffee?"

ND, but you are way more self-confident than ... well, me and practically anyone I know. Self-confidence is a prerequisite to enjoying dating.

Laga, unemployed wouldn't put you out of my dating pool. It's a temporary situation, out of your hands - hardly a defining characteristic. Once upon a better time, a person who didn't have a job might have been iffy, but these days? Not so much.