Stephanie can you tell her Joe will be super busy at that time but you would love to do lunch with just the two of you and maybe the kids?

---

That's the other thing I was thinking about and it's actually true. Joe will have to be studying probably almost every evening we are there and we have two weddings and a trip to NC planned for the three weekends we will be there. (I think I might die of exhaustion after this move.) So it's true. Maybe I should do that.

---

they were both raised in near poverty so by habit only cook very basic foods. I've had to teach myself how to use spices and fresh ingredients with a little more flair.

This describes my mother. She has never been that great of a cook. As a kid, she was raising three of us alone, and had multiple jobs, so we kids learned to cook at a young age. She never really used spices. I did. It was like chemistry class. One time, when I was visiting from college, she made me some meatballs and said "I know you like them with some spice, so I added extra flavor for you". Ya. That pinged the radar. The meatballs were saturated with a TON of garlic powder. Even worse, garlic powder that had been sitting over the stove for YEARS and was clumpy and far from fresh. She could see from the first bite, and was like "ooo, too much??" um, ya.

---

We RESPECT each others interests but don't have to pretend to love it.

Exactly. And occasionally be a good sport (no pun intended) about participating/watching it. I would not, for example, expect an SO to come see every show at my theatre, but maybe come to the occasional opening night party or whatever.

(By which I mean Not Allowed To Leave The House level of stay indoors?)

In my family, the mother doesn’t leave the house for the first two weeks, and the baby doesn’t leave for the first six weeks. Seems to be working so far. I won’t fight if and when the time comes.

When my parents got married, my mom didn’t know how to cook (her mom was a control freak that wouldn’t let anyone else do anything, so she was a little sheltered). My dad knew how to cook, he was the child of a single mother who worked. So, my dad taught my mom to cook. When she got the hang of it, she took over, and is a great cook. When she went back to school when Bro and I were in high school, we all cooked one night a week. It became a competition of sorts (in my family? Really? Shocking!) who could make the best meal that week. (Fridays were tacos or pizza or the like, and Mom cooked on weekends)

My mom also made sure that my brother knew how to clean a house and my dad made sure that I knew how to mow the lawn. There was no gender assigned work in our house. We had chores, and we did them. And look, two totally self sufficient adults!

I'm much more likely to come home to a clean house and some nummy takeout, which is JUST FINE TOO.)

Hell, I’d prefer that. I like to cook, but I HATE to clean. I can and do do it, but I don’t like it

---

Yeah, I'd try to hook up with the woman and kids and avoid the husband at all costs. Does her husband work days? Oh, Frisco's early bedtime means you can't meet up for dinner or in the evenings, but a morning out with the kids would be great!

---

DH admits to me very sheepishly that he LOVES it when he comes home and dinner is ready--but that really only happens about 20-30% of the time.

My college roommate would often have dinner waiting for me when I got home. He actually did this before we were even roommates if he knew I'd be coming over.

To this day, one of the sweetest memories I have of being in college is walking into Stephen's room and finding his desk cleared of all books and set up with a chicken salad sandwich (smuggled out of the dining hall) and a cup of coffee (free in the lounge) on a napkin place-mat.

---

Frisco's early bedtime means you can't meet up for dinner or in the evenings

This really is one of the greatest things about kids. I mean, his bed time really is 7:00 and you can tell when he's out past that time.

---

And then there's my situation, where I've had well-meaning but utterly condescending people tell me what a "catch" I am simply because I love baseball.

I got told I was a "great wife" because I went on this motorcycling trip with Jason. Now, I don't think I would go motorcycling if I didn't know him in the first place, but I wouldn't go on a week long trip if I didn't like it on my own. Exploring his interests is like a bonus with purchase for me--being with him brings along cool stuff for me to explore. I know he feels the same.

---

I recently researched a team someone liked in order to have a topic of conversation next time I saw him.

I even attempted to borrow a jersey so he'd see me wearing it from stage in order to facilitate hanging out with him after the show and talking -- but the jersey's owner refused on moral grounds. The whole thing was hysterical.

I found him anyway and we had plenty of stuff to talk about even without my research.

---

Stephanie, I think I'd avoid the couple in DC. It sucks but I don't think you can totally count on the husband not being there. I have major issues with my cousin's husband and he sometimes shows up when I thought I'd made a husband-proof plan. You just can't be sure unless you say, "Don't bring your husband," which is tough to do.

DW does the cooking in our house and I clean it up.

---