I must be a complete outlier in having loved our big-ass wedding (especially the part where I started crying and then Hec started crying and then
everyone
started crying. Runny noses everywhere! That was awesome.).
If you're not me, though (and clearly you are not, else both ND and Hec are in for a big surprise one of these days), then I endorse the elope-right-away, let-them-fuss-over-the-party-later-on plan. If you're very lucky, you could end up being like my brother and brother-in-law, whose big party ended up getting delayed by nearly half a decade, at which point all the families were just happy that anything was happening at all.
Just don't stint on the cake. Cake is key.
Also, I strongly endorse the corset dress option (not least because you'll have to come up to SF at least a couple of times for fittings).
JZ - I loved my big wedding, too. It was awesome and fun and a total blast. And plannig it from 2500 miles away made for very little family input. Woohoo!!
t I insert my standard disclaimer that while elopement was awesome for me, I know many people who have loved the celebration and I am not bagging on it.
No outliers when it comes to weddings! Do what makes you happy!
big weddings are for some, but it is up to the couple. I get the whole family/ village celebration. But it can be truly crazy making as well. I think adults get to make that decision
And I'm the inlier! I tried to elope, but ended up with a wedding planned with the speed of gazelles. Crazy, crack-addled gazelles with cake. But then, my dad walked me down the aisle and that's something I'm so glad I had.
And it was wonderful. It would have been wonderful to elope, too, and it probably would have been wonderful if we'd elaborately and carefully planned a wedding for years. It didn't matter, because at the end of the day I get to spend the rest of my life with the person I adore more than any other in the world.
And so will you.
Steve Martin's character's daydream of the backyard barbecue wedding is more my speed than how the main event actually played out in Father of the Bride.
backyard barbecue wedding
That's basically what my sister did, with a lot of style. My dad had a decent-sized garden in which to put up a marquee, so they fitted a fair few people in. It was definitely done in their own style. Which seems to be the key to getting these things right.
I don't think big weddings are bad at all! This time, though, we can't afford a big wedding (plus, I did that once already), and the stress that it would cause Drew to worry about his mom and sister (though for very different reasons) would take the enjoyment right out of it. Unfortunately we also can't elope right away because of some lingering financial business stuff Drew has to deal with before we can make it legal. The soonest we could take care of it is probably after New Years.
