I had this theory that's always worked in the past that when I stop looking for love it finds me. It's been over a year now and I think maybe it's time to reevaluate that theory. I don't mind dating, it's the reaching out and taking that first step that terrifies the hell out of me.

Congratulations, Aims!

I'm sorry, Sean and Omnis. Whenever I get glum about my lack of a love life, I remember that there are probably quite a few wonderful men out there, equally single, alone, and wishing they knew someone just like me. And it doesn't help a damn bit because that just means there's twice as many people lonely.

Yeah, not helpful. Sorry.

I have found being not in a relationship better than being in an unhappy relationship, for whatever that's worth.

One more story:

My friend R had been married to her high school sweetheart. 20 years later, He changed. It as not a pleasant divorcee. She spent a lot of time reconnecting with friends, and getting to know some of the people involved in her outside interests better. Not looking for love, just friends. Eventually, she told her friend D, Look I have a crush n you. This doesn't have to change anything, but I felt it was unfair to not let you know. ( R had been emotionally battered by her husband for at least 3 or 4 years). D is a cautious man, he didn't answer R for a few months. They are together and happy now

I know people that have gone out looking for love and found it. (eharmony couples mostly) Others, while not anti-love, just were looking for ways to grow and that's when they found love .

Intellectually, I know I am WAAAY better off than I was in my dysfunctional relationship.

My heart seems unconvinced right now.

hearts are like that

Yeah, well, unfortunately we are social creatures.

Which is why I've locked myself in my room with just the computer.

I've never actually been on a date. The concept terrifies me.

Me neither. Of the exactly two relationships I've ever been in, one doesn't count because it was a stupid half-assed high school thing, and the other I married. Neither involved dating. I have ZERO idea how either one began.

And all my friends are you invisible people in the shiny networked box, so...yeah. Advice on being a social human is an unmixy thing with me.

Advice on being a social human is an unmixy thing with me.

Same here. At 40, I've had so little dating experience it's not even funny.

I have organized food! I ran out of clean pots, so dinner was leftovers, and I actually had my choice of leftovers, all clearly labeled.

A well-stocked freezer makes me happy.

We have returned from Star Trek and I have declared my desire for my very own Bones for my birthday.

That's all.