Bonny, it's so hard to walk the line between not wanting to make that decision too soon but not wanting to prolong pain and suffering, and it's only harder when so many of the test results and signs are "normal." You and Cagney were so lucky to have each other, and I'm so sorry for your loss.
She just... she just did the math.
Kaylee ,'Objects In Space'
Natter 78: I might need to watch some Buffy for inspiration
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, butt kicking, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
Steph L. - Feb 06, 2026 8:41:54 am PST #11462 of 11571
this mess was yours / now your mess is mine
bennett - Feb 06, 2026 9:19:25 am PST #11463 of 11571
What Steph said.
erikaj - Feb 06, 2026 9:25:48 am PST #11464 of 11571
"already on the kiss-cam with Karl Marx"-
yeah, this.
JenP - Feb 06, 2026 9:52:37 am PST #11465 of 11571
Perfectly said, Steph. Much love to you, bee. Rest well, sweet Cagney.
brenda m - Feb 06, 2026 10:05:05 am PST #11466 of 11571
If you're going through hell/keep on going/don't slow down/keep your fear from showing/you might be gone/'fore the devil even knows you're there
Oh Bonny. Oh Cagney. I’m so so sorry.
Laura - Feb 06, 2026 10:53:51 am PST #11467 of 11571
Our wings are not tired.
I'm so sorry. You and Cagney were so good for each other. Much love.
DavidS - Feb 06, 2026 10:57:24 am PST #11468 of 11571
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."
As your friend said, Cagney's last gift was to ease out of this world without forcing you to make that decision. Much love to you.
Shir - Feb 06, 2026 11:10:33 am PST #11469 of 11571
"And that's why God Almighty gave us fire insurance and the public defender".
Bonny, I'm so sorry.
lisah - Feb 06, 2026 11:17:08 am PST #11470 of 11571
Punishingly Intricate
I’m so sorry for your loss, Bonny. Cagney was lucky to have you as his person.
beekaytee - Feb 06, 2026 11:57:03 am PST #11471 of 11571
Compassionately intolerant
Thank you all so much. He really was a gift to me.
Today, I am looking forward to when I stop unconsciously taking care of him and then noticing that we won't be going on that walk and I don't need to cook for him.
David, I spoke to her again, and she had an interesting, metaphysical take on why Cagney had been really distant, not avoidant but more _void_, on Tuesday and beyond. As I tried to lift him into my neighbor's car, it was chaotic, and at one point, he 'melted'...just flopped over. I honestly thought he'd been paralyzed. Or, that the pain had overcome him.
He never really noticed me, or anyone else, after that. My friend E theorizes that, in that moment his 'doggyness' left, such that his spirit actually died in my arms. It feels like it should not, but that actually comforts me. The docs were amazing, but I like the idea that he wasn't really present for all that.