Disqus is blocked at work. So now there are a whole bunch of sites that don't have comments any more.

Yeah, me too. I read a little on my phone, but it's rarely worth the hassle.

Did you punch him in the nuts?

She did not. She recognized me and hugged me back.

But she did look alarmed, vaguely horrified.

It's been longer than I can even think since I've felt crushy and fluttery about anyone, which is fine by me (partly because I'm hideously lacking in social ept at the best of times, and partly because I never did get the hang of just having a crush without trying to act on it, and the emotional energy I spent on them was ridiculous). Having a nice settled spousal relationship is lovely--I can enjoy random moments like this morning, when Hec was headed out the door with Matilda and somehow looked so rumpled and tousled that my heart went a little flippy, without having my brain totally derailed for the rest of the day.

I'm just sad (though not surprised) that Matilda flipped out two steps away from the front gate and sobbed all the rest of the way to school. Lately she's just exhausting, physically and emotionally. Clingy and crazy affectionate or sulky and arms-crossed-I'm-mad-at-you; every little thing from taking off the wet diaper in the morning to toothbrushing at night turns into a major negotiation to shut down, fend off or work around the tears; every small treat or outing turns disastrous (I now just categorically refuse to draw or sew or sculpt anything for her, because it always comes out wrong, and all wrong things lead to tears); everything from sock seams to raindrops is out to get her; there is no task so small or insignificant that she won't make a giant battle of wills out of it.

Parenting has been hard, wearying, smelly, boring and occasionally nauseating before, but we've totally been able to roll with it. Lately, though, it's just been the kind of no fun that drains your very soul, and I personally am utterly damned if I know what's prompting it or how to turn it around; I just know I'm fried, and it's actually fun to come in to work each morning. Working for a pure diva of a surgeon in a dysfunctional department--fun, and more restful than home! How wrong is that?

Did you punch him in the nuts? Tell me you punched him in the nuts.

I didn't. But that reminds me of the time msbelle punched the "pirate" in the face.

I just know I'm fried, and it's actually fun to come in to work each morning. How wrong is that?

It's not that wrong. You have to spend significant amounts of time and energy in two very different places. It's OK if one seems better than the other at times. Because you know the thing about parenting is how fast it changes, because of how fast the kids are changing. I'm sure it seems like forever right now, but really -- this too shall pass.

My mom used to say she was gonna change her name and run away.

But that reminds me of the time msbelle punched the "pirate" in the face.

I have a sudden need to hear this story.

We've been having a bit of that too, JZ. Just met up with Isaac's teacher this morning to discuss his recently developed strategy of first misbehaving in class and then flipping out in tears. Poor noodle. I know he's a bit sick right now and that's a stressor. And I sometimes suspect that misbehavior preceeds a growth spurt, as if their little bodies get flooded with hormones or something.

(Note: not a scientist so the above conjecture is likely 100% inaccurate.)

Hey look! Paul Gross is on Broadway!

And I sometimes suspect that misbehavior preceeds a growth spurt

My friend Alison theorized that they tend to flip out as they approach developmental milestones. Again, on the notion that their li'l brains are processing too many elements to be entirely socialized.

I don't think I've ever had the giggle:blush:stammer reaction. Hell, I was able to talk like a reasonably coherent person to my rock star crush object, instead of blurting out "Oh my G-d, you are prettier than your photos", which is what was running through my brain.

It's comforting to know it's not just her and not just us, Burrell. Lots of vibes to you and Isaac. And I do need to remember that, as misery-inducing as it is for the rest of us, it's gotta truly suck to be the kid doing it. They're clearly not enjoying themselves; they just can't keep themselves from going totally off the rails. Those emotional storms have got to be twice as exhausting to experience from the inside.