Most Mexican places make their corn tortillas with just corn meal and water, though checking doesn't hurt.

Re: the lipstick conversation -- I was getting really hot under the collar and stepped away so I wouldn't get needlessly nasty, not because I was angry at anyone here. It wasn't a flounce; I just needed to chill my own self out. And then of course my job actually wanted some of my time.

I can try to explain my thoughts more if it's warranted, but it seems like the discussion has reached a natural end, and I'm totally cool with that, too. (Super short version -- society/culture/context: we're soaking in it, and damn if it isn't complicated and fraught.)

And then of course my job actually wanted some of my time.

Darn those people who pay us money.

Zenkitty, I give a lot of things to Goodwill, but these were either heavy or awkward things that I didn't want to try to take there and things that would be hard for Goodwill to sell, like partial boxes of office supplies. The latter when to a good nonprofit.

'tis true.

I love office supplies.

I do too. This is why I must at times bite the bullet and get rid of office supplies that seemed like a good idea at the time.

Odd phrase question: In a story about a local city council meeting, one of the city councilmen said, re: a situation he disagreed with, "They are up in the night about X."

I know "up in the night" means "completely wrong like a wrong thing that is wrong", but I think I learned that from British mysteries. What is the actual source of that phrase? I don't know the councilman, but I suspect he's a native Utahn--as in, born here of pioneer Mormon stock, not a member of the Ute nation--and I'm surprised to see that phrase in actual use in the wild around here.

society/culture/context: we're soaking in it, and damn if it isn't complicated and fraught

Yup.

I think it's a difficult conversation to have, with all the best will in the world, because at the same time, many things are simultaneously true: we are affected by the culture around us, including socially-defined concepts of beauty and sexuality; we want to present ourselves in ways that we, personally, find attractive; we want to believe that our values are our own, not created by outside forces; we value the freedom to make our own decisions and operate as individuals.

Navigating all that is... messy. I hope that acknowledging that society (at least partly) shapes our concepts of femininity and beauty doesn't take away from Allyson's control of her own body presentation--but I can see how Allyson might perceive it that way.

And I don't have an answer for that, except that I think it's better to be aware of these issues, because it gives us, as women, more power. I use performative feminity more consciously (and successfully) now that I'm aware it is a performance, than I did when I was younger and my distaste for makeup and dresses made me think I wasn't a proper girl.

I don't know if that made any sense.

I'm so sorry about Byron, Pix.

People's worst nightmare at holiday parties -- vegans and gluten-free people. [link]

I'm cracking up at how, in my FB post about it, the comments have devolved into praising bacon and Lindsey's plastic hand.

And now I just suggested a new Ryan Gosling tumblr: Hey, Girl, I Hear You Have Food Sensitivities.

"Hey girl, I hear you can't eat gluten. Let me make you some wheat-free torte. It's my grandma's recipe."

I think it's a difficult conversation to have, with all the best will in the world, because at the same time, many things are simultaneously true

I agree with your entire post. And that right up there is what I kept wrestling with as I started and then deleted a couple posts. I still can't say what I want to say without taking forever and not really expressing just what I mean anyway.

I just tried again right here in this post and failed, so I give up. Fraught is a good word for it.