The drawing I linked to is based on this cameo: [link]

But this dad was just so angry that it made me sad for the kid.

The mom definitely has some major issues that predate giving birth by a very long while...and the dad (as described by the mom and a couple of independent observers) definitely has some attention issues, among other things.

The saddest bit is that the child is learning to lie, cheat, manipulate and escalate as his only coping mechanisms. When I ask him to describe what he means when he says 'be nice', it's tragic how the entire concept is framed in loss and pain for him. In other words, nice isn't about feeling good about yourself or other people, but pretending to be so means you won't get punished as much.

I suffered so much with violence and abomination in my childhood, but by the grace of whatever, I was able to see how wrong it was. For this child, there is no sense of himself that doesn't involve getting over on other people in order to be safe.

Even worse, the mom sees the kid respond positively to stronger boundaries but then says that it can't work at home. Bitter hopelessness.

So, very, very sad.

I put on my big girl knickers and actually talked to my migraine doctor about my weekly pain meds. He's visibly displeased about me taking this much of them.

But...he thinks I have some "right" or something to not be in constant pain, and he has something called a "duty" to minimise the amount of pain I'm in. So he'll prescribe what it takes to keep me walking, as long as it doesn't make me sicker, but he's looking for stuff that makes him more comfortable for me to take all the time.

Problem is, I'm in so much fucking pain right now. The meds are barely touching it. Coming in to work was massively hard, and just sitting here is pretty miserable.

Ha! I just sent an email to my husbans thinking he could help Burell -- and he already put in his two cents

I don't know for sure where the cameo-maker got it. It could be the pattern maker saw the same engraving and made a pattern from that. I do know that the pattern itself has been blogged extensively and has thus been seen by a lot of people. And the pattern page includes that engraving.

Oh, ita. So very sorry. I'm glad the doctor at least prescribed more meds. I hope he does find stuff that works better without tripping his alarm bells.

Oh, ita. I'm glad your doc is keeping up the prescription and so sorry it isn't doing enough.

That's some kind of progress, ita, I hope. I'm sorry it's such a bad pain day, though.

beth, congratulations on the job! Whoot!

he thinks I have some "right" or something to not be in constant pain, and he has something called a "duty" to minimise the amount of pain I'm in

That sounds like a good answer to me - I mean, if the meds you were taking now were working, there would be a good argument for keeping you on them. But since you're not satisfied with the results and your doctor is concerned about dependence/side-effects/whatever, it's in everyone's interest to keep looking for better solutions. I'm so sorry there haven't been any easy answers so far.

Thanks. It's something. I also have an accommodation note to give my boss about asking for working from home...but I'm in no condition to have that conversation today, I don't think.

At least he's not telling you to dance and drink coffee.

Whew, my candles made it in time and I found my menorah. Usually my local grocery store carries a few, but I don't think they realized how early Hannukah was coming this year so I had to order. Now I just need to figure out how to test that frozen-candles-drip-less hypothesis and I'll be all set.