If I am not thinking critically about afilm (or book or TV show or whatever) it cleary didn't engage me at any worthwhile level.

But I agree that pissing on someone's Cheerios is bad form also.

But I agree that pissing on someone's Cheerios is bad form also.

My friends and I agreed on a half hour to hour grace period where those who enjoyed the movie could have an afterglow before those who disdained were allowed to pick it apart.

Basically not just railing about it as soon as you walk out the door, but coming back to the conversation when you were back home or out eating.

If I am not thinking critically about a film (or book or TV show or whatever) it cleary didn't engage me at any worthwhile level.

YES YES YES YES YES. Not to mention the tremendous pleasure of rolling even the very shiniest of shiny things over and over and around and looking at it from different angles that make you squint and refocus and go "huh! a whole other facet of shiny!"

What I get all the time and hate is, "What did you think of (let's say District 9 for example), Raq?"

Raq: "Great effects."

"I know! And it really made you think!"

Raq: "I guess. I thought it was Lethal Weapon. I mean, one of the "unlikely partner guys" is even working on his boat."

(long pause) "Wow, you really think about these things, don't you?"

My friends and I agreed on a half hour to hour grace period where those who enjoyed the movie could have an afterglow before those who disdained were allowed to pick it apart.

But it's a false dichotomy - I pick apart movies I love just as much as I do movies I hate (if not moreso), and I almost always have something I want to say the second the end credits roll to make sure I don't forget about it later.

Mostly I try not to see movies with people unless I know they'll enjoy tearing them apart with me afterwards. Having to hold my tongue to respect someone else's desire to "just enjoy it for what it is" will almost invariably lead to my hating the film because of the bad mood that not being able to talk about it puts me in.

But it's a false dichotomy

It's more of a compromise. Besides, it's not something you're beholden to. Just an agreement among my college circle of friends.

Also, I think some people just like to sit with their reaction after the end of the movie. Sometimes you walk out of a movie feeling one way, and when you've distanced yourself from that immediate, often visceral, experience, you might pick it apart and feel (for example) that it was too manipulative and got that emotional charge from you based on some cheap tearjerking (children in jeopardy! Soaring string section!) instead of earning it narratively.

The post-film nitpicking is part of the experience for me. If I'm not going to analyze a film and pick it apart, why see it at all?

This is true for me, too.

Megan Walker and I had a great experience recently, when we saw A Simple Man and walked out of the theatre hating every single character in the movie. We were all "let's go look at the poster and stare at it and make sure it was really the Coens..." and there was a tall man standing in front of the poster, sort of in post-movie euphoria.

I asked him sincerely "did you like this movie"?

"Yes. It was exceptional. I grew up in Minneapolis during the time period depicted and this movie captured the experience perfectly. What did you think?"

Megan and I both gulped and I asked "so it was just like that? ...did you absolutely loathe every single person who surrounded you?"

"Yes."

And we all burst out laughing. But that little moment led me to rethink the movie and appreciate what it accomplished. I just didn't have the cultural reference points to properly evaluate it. But I've never had that problem with any previous Coen bros movie.

Psst, A Serious Man.

Regardless, that was too funny.

Psst, A Serious Man.

(Oh how funny, I always get that mixed up! And I even thought, while I was typing "what does that smug guy say? "I'm a simple man"? Yeah...that's right.)

I have to add that I am notoriously choosy about who I go see movies with, and under what circumstances. I hate watching movies at someone's house (outside of an SO), mostly because if I am headed over to someone's house, I want to visit. And I don't visit while watching movies.

I am really uptight about talking, chewing, texting etc when it comes to watching movies in a theatre, and will go get an usher is someone is repeatedly checking a cell phone (so that all I see is a neon light every 5 seconds) in front of me.

But what Jess said, I am mostly picky about it because the movies to me are an art form, and I respect them and want to take them in with someone who feels the same way. It's totally part of the experience to evaluate it afterwards! Steve has gotten used to this...he was more of the "I only go to movies to escape" kind before dating me. Now he likes to talk a little about them afterwards, but not as much as I do. He's learning though. And he doesn't talk during them, so that's awesome.