Does anyone here take insulin? I suspect that's where I'm headed, and I'm dealing with probably old information in my head and a general sense of "If you took care of yourself, you loser, you wouldn't need this." How intrusive is it, am I doomed to be on the stuff forever, how much of a pain is it (literally and figuratively)?

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Connie, I'm not personally on insulin, but I have many diabetic family members. GENERALLY, once insulin is required, it's permanent. It isn't necessarily something that can be avoided by rigorous diet control, though the onset of its requirement can be delayed that way (and it's not a matter of "you're a loser with no self-control", either - the US food industry makes it nearly impossible to control sugar intake. You'd basically need to home-grow and home-prep EVERYTHING YOU EAT, EVER.)

And it's progressive. Some people progress really slowly, but again - generally - over time, the dosage must be increased. It's a nuisance of progressin: as you add insulin from outside, the pancreas starts producing LESS, and so forth.

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Thanks, all.

Scola and Sean, you're both awesome. Just thought it worth mentioning.

Someone suggest to me that I might had a test anxiety, after describing how Statistics final made me feel like: like I'm standing on the edge of a cliff, and all I have to take is one small step to do what they want me to do. It's not that I can't to it: it just that it seems totally irrational for me to do so.

However, I didn't really freeze today. Just sometimes had to stare at a problem for 10 minutes, to realize it's Very Simple Shit and spend 30 seconds solving it and writing it down.

I don't know - can you even have a test anxiety for just one subject? I seriously don't have any problem whatsoever with memorizing 900+ years of historical or philosophical narratives, as long as they're not in a form of equation.

And given that now I kindda want to switch from being an information management girl to web analyst, it kindda sucks.

Also, the Whigs' tribute album with hot mocha and cool breeze is wonderful.

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As always, Tom Scola and Teppy are both wise and loving.

connie,

"If you took care of yourself, you loser, you wouldn't need this."

is not only something you have no way to actually know for sure, but even if factually true, the kind of thought that is singularly useless for living a healthy, happy life in the Now (see above discussion of the Past as a place of residence). From my observations of loved ones who have used it, it is a smidge more fuss and bother than continual testing, maybe on a par with, say, a nebulizer. If your body currently needs injections of that hormone in order to have optimal functioning right now, it is no less a failure to do it than for someone whose brain chemistry is messed up to take psychotropic meds.

As for being doomed to use it forever, I can't predict that. You might wish to check out Richard K. Bernstein's book [link] Dr. Bernstein's Diabetes Solution. I believe he discusses ways to eat that will reduce, if not eliminate, the need for using insulin. But you may find it is more restrictive than you care for.

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it is no less a failure to do it than for someone whose brain chemistry is messed up to take psychotropic meds.

Snerk. My psychotropic drugs issues, let me show you them.

They fall exactly in the same place as my thoughts on insulin, ie, a well-regulated mind/body doesn't need drugs.

My rock-jawed Puritan ancestors would be so proud. And I'm fully aware that my logic does not resemble Earth logic. (Boy, I'm full of the pop psych today. Or of something.)

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So, last night, Date Girl and I drove out to Angeles Crest, found a dark spot (filled with many other people), laid out on the hood of my car, and watched the Perseids while holding hands.

That sounds just marvellous.

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can Tramadol depress you (emotionally)? I know it does physically, but I was wondering about the mood element.

It's known for increasing seratonin. It makes me exceptionally cheery (alas, also nauseous and headachy, so I avoid it). I could see how it could have the opposite effect in some people, in the same way that there are some people who get more depressed, not less, on anti-depressants.

Had first interview with potential PA. The rest are tomorrow, 9 til 3 with only two breaks - should be interesting! The first one was pretty good. She had good ideas around empowerment. I like that attitude much more than the 'I want to take care of you to make myself feel better' types.

I don't know - can you even have a test anxiety for just one subject?

If it's a subject that doesn't agree with you, I can totally see that. I used to ace English and French tests, and then lose the plot so badly over Maths exams that I once or twice actually ran out of the room screaming. Sorry to hear about your anxiety over the test, Shir - I hope it gets a bit easier. Or at least that you don't have to take Statistics for too much longer.

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I knew it!

(Lyrics taken from The Afghan Whigs' "The Slide Song")

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There are dark chocolate Reese's Cups. The irony of this knowledge vis a vis my previous remarks about insulin is not lost on me.

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That sounds just marvellous.

It was really sweet and special and amazing.

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