JUST THINK WHAT IT WOULD DO FOR HER COLLEGE DATING PROSPECTS.

I AM, GODDAMMIT.

I mean, it beats muscle cars and heavy metal.

Hey! It worked ... okay, wait, no, it didn't work for some of us. VampiresGoths and gaming geeks are the way to go for dating prospects.

I mean, it beats muscle cars and heavy metal.

Sindarin is better than a bass?

I can see that.

At least it'll be a more interesting variety of someone who is in no way good enough for our Ticky.

My mother is all worried about what I'm going to eat in Maine.

I've always found that the lobster was optional, not required. Maybe explain salads to her again? And pasta. And ... you know everything you actually already eat on a daily basis?

JUST THINK WHAT IT WOULD DO FOR HER COLLEGE DATING PROSPECTS.

I AM, GODDAMMIT.

I don't know if this would be any less funny if I weren't *hearing* it so clearly but I am dying laughing right now.

I mean, it beats muscle cars and heavy metal.

But not muscle cars and Japanese pop songs.

Ooh-Ay Ooooooo-ay oohhhh

Or muscle cars and Japanese pop songs.

Do we get Surprise!GWay and a thunderstorm with this option?

And really, breakfast is cereal or whatever in the house, lunch most days will be sandwiches and salad and fruit that we bring to the beach in a cooler, and just about everywhere has some interesting-looking vegan stuff on the menu. The brew pub that my dad likes has a black bean chili. The diner that we all like has a grilled vegetable sandwich. The fancy Italian place has pizza that I can ask for without cheese, if their pasta has eggs. Another place where we usually go has several tofu dishes on the menu. At the Clam Shack, the only thing I can eat is the french fries, but that's a casual place with picnic tables, so I can make a sandwich to bring and have that with the fries.

FARM animals. Cows, pigs, chickens, turkeys, goats, sheep, and so on. No carnivores among them.

Pigs are omnivores, they could definitely regard a chicken as snackable. Most of the other things too, if they thought they could get away with it.

Pigs are omnivores, they could definitely regard a chicken as snackable. Most of the other things too, if they thought they could get away with it.

Really? Interesting. I don't think I've ever seen a pig eating another animal, at least not intentionally. Though, now that I think about it, I have seen footage of a boar eating another animal, and boars are related to pigs, so I guess it makes sense.

I don't think I've ever seen a pig eating another animal, at least not intentionally.

Clearly you've never seen a sow with her young.

and boars are related to pigs

A boar is a wild kind of pig. Not just a relation but A Pig.

No, Clovis and I figured out that MM and SH would end up in a giant I AM THE BETTER EVIL OVERLORD dance-off or something, thus leaving myself and the Devilbunny room to get on with our plans.

Aha, varlet! I challenge thee to a Dance Dance Revolution tourney, wherein...

...what's that?

...I've just been reminded by a faithful lackey that I *suck* at dancing. Very well, then. STAR TREK TRIVIA AT FORTY PACES!

I shall meet you, sir StuntHusband, and the vile rodent Clovis at dawn upon the green.

I am confident of my chances.