After working for a over a year at Lowe's I finally have a red vest. Still don't have an ID badge yet. I also turned on my corporate laptop for the 2nd time ever, but it couldn't connect to the corporate network so it is dead to me once again.

Also, I saw the trailer for Whisky Tango Foxtrot and it made me want to see the movie, but now I keep getting that exs and ohs song in my head something I now entirely blame on Tina Fey. I also saw the trailer for The Big Short and I want to see it too. I read the book and was pretty shocked that it actually got made into a movie. I have a secret hope that the movie will raise awareness of some of the hijinks that happened leading up to the great recession and maybe something happening to fix at least the, you know, outright fraud. Similar secret hopes are world peace, faster than light travel, and an affordable rocket boot.

So my best junk mail this morning is an invitation from 420 Matcher looking to hook me up with another cannabis loving soulmate or some such. Okay.

Just what you need, Laura!

I can't find my employee badge, and just yesterday our Safety guy sent out a "don't let people shirttail you inside, even if you know them" email (there was an incident with a random naked guy outside yesterday morning - he didn't try to get inside and he seemed pretty docile, really, but triggered the restatement of official policy, I guess). Fortunately my one coworker did not take that to heart and let me in. Whew!

Fortunately my one coworker did not take that to heart and let me in. Whew!

Probably because you were wearing clothes.

(You *are* wearing clothes, right???)

Gud, you work at Lowe's??

Wait, random naked guy??? I feel like there's a low risk of shirttailing there...

(You *are* wearing clothes, right???)

I am! Big fat checkmark for adulting on that one.

I feel like there's a low risk of shirttailing there...

Maybe more if he decided he needed a shirt after all and wanted yours? (In reality he was just wandering around by the picnic table getting rained on, poor guy. I don't think there was a lot of rational decision making going on)

Gud, you work at Lowe's??

Yeah. I'm a software engineer working on their home automation stuff.

This thing: Iris by Lowe's

ION, I don't give a damn about Steve Harvey screwing up the Miss Universe crowning, my only reaction was "Tom and Lorenzo will have their review of the costumes up! Woot!"

Neat, Gud! So is that a pretty good system?

In I-am-12 news, some poor soul has the email address of twatkins@whatever.com I'm glad I don't actually service that account because I would ALWAYS be calling them by that name in my head.