That your colors are aquamarine and taupe(Don't even come NEAR me with that teal crap...what is this, Studio 54?) And instead of a cake, your cousin is gonna make adorable prune danishes, and you're gonna dance to "Close To You" even though part of you thinks it's hacky and played-out instead of retro and adorable...what do you think?

Achievement unlocked: wedding planned!

I didn't find it very funny, myself.

Hard to argue with this. For me, my reaction was, "Wait, what? Oh."

Ah, not knowing the formula for the circumference of a circle threw me off.

I dislike comics that make me feel dumb. I think I'll wander around that huge picture that shows the world.

I'll go with the theory that some people think women have their weddings all planned out way before they get engaged. Or assume it's a fast process. I don't know.

Tep, can you try saying something like, "We have a date and a location and unfortunately I'm really busy with (work thing)/have to make a call and can't talk about it now."

Or you could just describe the wedding in Steel Magnolias.

Claim your colors are International Hailing Distress Orange and Paisley. While they're trying to figure that one out, escape.

Actually, of course, those are parody "wedding details" but I've eyerolled through enough of these conversations(despite them making me feel like a Teamster on hormone replacement, femininity wise) that I think I've got it. Bonus points if you can find a "cute" way to call Tim a moron and get your way. Or make a "suggestive" reference to all the sex you've not had since you got your rock. I'd better stop. I'm making my own reflux act up.

Actually, of course, those are parody "wedding details"

That's okay, I'll still go with those. Because then I'm all done.

"My colors are paisley and plaid." I like it.

People asked me my colors, I kind of blinked at them in confusion, then said "My mother-in-law is doing it." "Don't you care about your own wedding?" "I care that it's legal, beyond that, no." I was given very disappointed looks.

Achievement unlocked: wedding planned!

Is this basic net nerd lingo now? I keep seeing all these gaming conversations that make no sense, because you couldn't do that in Zork or Tetris, but I think even I get that.

I know I'm being curmudgeonly, but I wish people would stop sending emails just to thank me for doing my job. I'm sure to them it seems like it would be rude not to, but it's just one more thing I have to delete!