My brother has apparently told my mother that he plans to be engaged (um, to his actual girlfriend, not just theoretically) this year, and she should expect more grandchildren within 5 years. I find it hilarious that he is apparently engaged to be engaged. (I mean, the man is 33, not in, like, high school.)

Planning to be engaged makes me crazy. My coworker has been with her boyfriend for 10 years, plans to be with him forever, but he has some hangup about the ring and not having money. She saw some cheap but meaningful rings but decided against getting them. I'm like, DUDE. Just get the rings and be together! Don't spend money you don't have on a ring you don't care about.

But I understand that other people get to make their own life choices.

I suspect some of it is his girlfriend is from Texas, and her father is career military, and she's the oldest child in her family, and she's pretty young (24 I think), and they're moving in together this month, so perhaps a) they have to be engaged to be engaged to move in together and b) actually getting engaged needs to be A Big Deal with A Proposal. (I have not actually met his girlfriend.)

and then go have drinks with a friend to de-stress from dealing with my mother.

That's some good planning.

I emailed my resume to a Business Analyst colleague of Bob's to see if he can help me make it less super-specific to my industry. Not that I'm looking for a job or unhappy at my company, I just want to be ready Just In Case.

flea, was your mother maybe hassling your brother about when he was going to get married/give her more grandkids and he told her that to settle her down?

My stupid kitchen is still infested by moths.

Cedar chips are supposed to repel moths (we had a moth jamboree in our pantry a couple of years ago). But messy, right, because they're shredded pieces of cedar? But! If you have pantyhose/stockings/knee highs that you're willing to sacrifice to the cause, you can stuff a pantyhose leg (or stocking, or knee high) with cedar chips, tie the end off, and hang it in the moth-y area.

It looks weird, and isn't the best interior decorating idea, but it does get rid of moths. I have no idea why.

No, I think he is serious. He said he and L. would happily take my kids for a week-long visit (in Manhattan) any time the last time I talked to him. (I told him I suspected he was not fully up on exactly how much care a 5 year old needs and was he prepared to wipe butts?)

I mean, my mother is insanely pushy about settling down and grandkids, or at least she was with me, but I don't think he'd lie to her; our family tendency is more to point out the extreme rudeness of the pushiness and hang up if necessary.

The only way I was finally able to get rid of kitchen moths was putting everything in the freezer (well, not like cans of stuff but flour, sugar, rice) for a good, long time. Like, possibly, years? Anyway, things are not in the freezer now and they are fine. Fingers crossed!

Oh! I have a medicine question. Not sure if it's more appropriate here or in Bitches so I may ask in both.

I have a friend who has been on Zoloft for about 15 years off and on but steadily for the past 7 years. It has mostly worked very well for her but she's at the highest recommended dose and it has started not working. Her doctor is switching her to Effexor so she'll be transitioning to that from the Zoloft. I was wondering if anyone has had experience with Effexor or transitioning from Zoloft to another med and what your experience was.

It took me a month to get rid of them last year. A combo of throwing things away, sealing up anything unspoiled, freezing, and two enthusiastic cats. Note that anything that has little thready looking things in it -- it's spoiled.

but I don't think he'd lie to her

Oh, not that he was lying but maybe telling her their plan that they otherwise would have kept to themselves. I mean, we talked about getting engaged and picked out a ring together but didn't get actually engaged for a while after that. We didn't really tell people that was our plan though.