So, until then, I just keep up with the BS and the ACV or tea rinses and the wearing of hats.

Sigh.

I've gone to washing every couple of days. I'll use a dry shampoo if I sweat too badly after practice but I try to reduce how much I use.

I don't use shampoo on the kids at all and their hair is incredible--soft and thick.

I just look old. And worn out. Because I am.

You have a LOT on your plate. But I'm not agreeing with the looking old part.

My hair is short, and so fine, I don't know if I'd see a real difference. And I like shampoo! It smells good.

Grace has the most amazing hair. For her, I think it's having a good diet high in vegetable fats -- coconut oil, olive oil, avocado oil. And she has beautiful skin, which almost makes up for the wonky eye and the need to wear an eyepatch.

I wonder if the crap hair and skin is all just aging. Forty is turning out to be harsh on the body.

Forty is a lot harder on the body than I expected.

Why is it you're not supposed to shampoo?

The detergent strips the natural oils from your scalp, and your skin reacts by producing even more oil, making your scalp feel greasy and so you wash it more. It's worse for people with curly hair because it has a rougher (drier) texture, and the detergent makes for frizz and breakage. People with fine hair get the worst of the greasy feeling. If you just rinse it and massage conditioner through it, your skin/scalp is moisturized and will stop trying to overlubricate you. Same thing for acne creams, they make the problem worse by overdrying your skin.

Kat, if your skin feels super dry, try St Ives Apricot Scrub, and Eucerine non-comedigenic moisturizer in the bottle that has the SPF 30. You'll be sloughing off the dead skin, and the Eucerine is good on sensitive skin. They're both cheap and effective, I've found. It makes my skin feel soft/non-greasy all day.

The skin on my face doesn't feel dry at all -- but the wrinkles and the sun damage are bad. I really want some sort of medical intervention with injections and plumpers to make my face look less awful.

Oh good and the gray hair? FORGET IT.

On my feet and legs, I have been vaseline and that works like woah.

I think I spent the first half of my life thinking I had oily skin, when really I've had dry skin.

Also helpful? Running the humidifiers!

Forty is a lot harder on the body than I expected.

Cosign.

If it's any comfort, fifty hasn't been as bad a physical hit as forty. But, fuck, typing "fifty" and knowing it applies to me is still a massive kick in the psyche. I am not coping well with that one.

The panic is awful. I regret the years of smoking. I regret the years of being overweight. I fear it's too late to enjoy my face/body. And then I calm the fuck down. And then it starts again.

I wonder if my singledom makes it feel worse. I was chatting with a dude at work and the subject of age came up and I told him I'm 38. He said he wouldn't have guessed I was over 32. I said it's the purple hair. He said I have good skin. I think I probably do, rationally. It's hard to overcome the brainwashing.