It's dirty pool to stop someone on their way out of the office OBVIOUSLY FOR LUNCH when you know she has a 12:30 meeting and ask her to do stuff. I need to eat, bro.

Seinfeld' Actor Jerry Stiller Visits Real Residents of the Costanza Home, Everyone Feels Warm, Fuzzy

Man, Lakeview got pummeled.

OK, I've seen a number of blogs show this, so I'm posting it.

RIDICULOUS Summer's Eve Ad Boasts Promotion Abilities (PHOTO)

Yes, this is real. We can barely believe it either, but this ad for Summer's Eve feminine hygiene products featured in Woman's Day actually advises women to use Summer's Eve to better their chances of getting a promotion. There it is, listed as tip #1 under the copy "Confidence At Work: How To Ask For A Raise," right above "eat a healthy breakfast." Do we even want to know what being fresh "down there" has to do with job performance? We can't believe this was printed, but we'd also like to personally thank whoever was responsible for one of the most outrageous ads we've ever seen.

Oh, Comcast. So my six-month promotion ended, and I asked for another one. "Jason" informed me that I was not eligible since my promotion had just ended and I would have to wait six months, which is not true since I got my last promotion right after the one before ended. He then said that if they just give promotion after promotion, they are not "honoring" the regular prices. (BECAUSE YOUR REGULAR PRICES ARE EXORBITANT.) But! Because I was a "good payer and loyal to Comcast," he went looking...and he came back with $33 Internet for six months. Which is a whopping $12 a month discount. I was not impressed, but he said that was all he had, but he would make a note in my file that I was eligible for a better one after six months.

I started looking at my giant bill and wondered if I really wanted to pay all that. I wanted to know what this extra Digital Classic package I was paying for was. It looked like it was mostly the movie channels like Encore and Sundance and TCM, which are nice to have, but now that I have Netflix, they're not as useful. I could save $17 a month by cutting them out, but I wanted to confirm that I wasn't losing any channels I really did watch regularly.

I went in again and met "Vanessa." I remembered that I had gotten something in the mail about cable discounts, but I wasn't sure what it was. She came back with $40 Starter plus the $17 Classic. Where was this discount before, "Jason"?? The cable discount wasn't as good as the last two promotions, but it was still $25 a month. I asked if she had any Internet discounts, and she came back with $20 Internet. Now we're talking! What the fuck, "Jason"?? Screw your $33 Internet. I took the discounts and also cut the Classic—I don't think I'll miss it, as I have more than enough movie options on Netflix—and my bill's going down about $70 a month for six months.

Why was "Vanessa" able to give me deals that "Jason" wasn't? AND without any blah-di-blah about having just come off a promotion? That whole system is screwy.

Scary Sextoy Friday: Night Of The Living Dildo

Two words: zombie dildo.

You're heard of Cock Rock -- well, this is Cock Rot! It's part of a line of horror-film based dildos called Necronomicox (OMG BEST NAME EVAR!!)

eta: Photos of dildos are NSFW, right?

Looks like the outrage helped: Miss. school reverses race-based rules for student elections

You're heard of Cock Rock -- well, this is Cock Rot! It's part of a line of horror-film based dildos called Necronomicox (OMG BEST NAME EVAR!!)

The phrase "TEXTURED ROTTING PENIS HEAD!" isn't making me rush to the creepy sex-toy store.

GNYAGGGGGGH!

Woohoo, free pizza! And a soda!

Today Woot.com has a little carabiner digital camera with software that lets you insert yourself into scenes from some Batman movie or insert Bat-characters into your photos. How silly, right? I think I'll get one.